Bring Me Light - A Mediator Novel ***EDITING MAJORLY***

Bring Me Light - Chp 13

"So Seth tells me you're planning to go back to school Monday." Bec said watching me intently as we nursed hot chocolate. I knew she was checking to see if she thought I was emotionally stable to handle it.

"It will be good. To an extent a distraction. I gotta move forward some way and I'm in year eleven. I can't miss all my work." I admitted.

I wasn't over it, shoot I never was going to get over it but I knew mopping and wallowing away in the dark wasn't what was needed or what my parents would want. I needed time and distractions. I had to admit I am terribly cut that my parents had stayed, although I won't admit it out loud, I held the same opinions Bec had voiced. It was as if a goodbye wasn't even worth their time and that hurt, it scarred. Yet I couldn't dwell on it, maybe I was right, maybe there was nothing to tell us. I mean after all, mum and dad told me all I needed to hear from that voicemail message maybe that was their message. I hadn't told Bec or questioned her if she had one herself, though I knew she did and I knew it was sacred to her. I could imagine her transferring it to her computer for another source and back up to keep close when needed. It was a sense of connection. A safe haven and I was never letting go to anything that reminded me my parents loved me. Never.

Bec smiled, "I know, those blue eyes can take you places." She said knowingly seeing right through my other reasoning and finding the biggest one. I blushed. "What I don't get is why you guys haven't confessed your undying love and devotion." She said dramatically clutching her heart.

I laughed shortly, sighing I spoke miserably, "Cos we're just friends." I said emphasising it not for Bec but for myself.

Bec shook her head gently, ""When you got knocked, when I rushed to see. There were two reasons to why I didn't worry further more and snatch you up and take you home. One: I instantly knew you were safe. Those three are a great bunch and I knew they'd look after you just by their worried glances and I was proven right when they showed up to the funeral. Don't get me wrong Ange and Alex are great and they love, but now....well they won't be around as much." She admitted, I knew she was right things won't be the same, yet I knew I wasn't going to be alone. "And lastly," she continued "I didn't want to break Ben's heart" she said smiling slightly as I glanced up from my hot chocolate frowning, "He was looking at you constantly, he didn't glance away. He just kept stroking your hair or face. If I took you home, away from him, I'm sure he would have been shattered. Trust me Taylor, Ben adores you." She said knowingly, I smiled with all my might wanting to believe her yet I couldn't, not one hundred percent. I wasn't honest with him, even if he did like me somehow miraculously, could he knowing I wasn't honest and I wasn't normal?

Breaking into stories we began talking about other things going on in our own busy worlds bar the recent gut wrenching loss.

"So when you guys hitting the road?" I asked after a while of other chatter.

Bec glanced away sheepishly; "Well...." she began.

I tilted my head, "What?"

She picked up a billow hugging it as she tugged on a lose strand, "Well I've been sick of modelling for a while and defiantly now I don't want to be far from you." She said, I didn't speak, I don't think I was capable. "So I've taken up a course of fashion designing in town and I have a job that's linked up to my training, my experience so I'm still getting an income."

We had all agreed that mum and dad's money wouldn't be touched unless of an emergency and there were other legal matters related to the will. I didn't bother paying attention it was all too confusing.

"That's great!" I enthused excitedly.

"Yea." She agreed, "So me and Seth will stay, living at home."

I nodded eagerly, "What's Seth wanting to do?" I asked curious.

"He's got a job at the club with Mick, part time. And he is going to do a paramedics course."

My eyes bugged, "That's great. Everyone is doing what they want." I said practically bouncing in my seat.

"What about you?" Bec asked stretching out her face falling with emotions; pity? Sympathy? Anxiety?

I smiled, "I'm only seventeen. You're twenty." I said laughing softly, "It will all fall into place for me. It has to."

***

Crawling into bed late that night it was dead silent and still in the house. Seth had taken Bec out for some pampering and a form of getting away from the negatives. The house after all was a constant reminder though it held comfort. So quite easily I doze off.

***

"Taylor!" someone was squealing in my ear, I rolled over rubbing my eyes my room still dark as well as outside.

"What?" I groaned as she jumped up and down on me on my bed my body jostling, ouch.

"Guess what?" she said still jumping like a five year old, the minor light telling me her smile was anything but of a five years old, her excitement practically pulsing off her. I rubbed my eyes again sitting up more in bed. "Me and Seth are engaged." She cheered shoving her hand under my nose not waiting for me to guess.

"Wow." I said suddenly awake, it was beautiful.

"I know." She agreed still jumping.

"Bec?" I murmured yawning, "In the morning?" I practically pleaded as my eyes drew shut.

Distantly I hear her laugh and felt her crawl of and saying something like "Sure." But I was already gone.

***

"It's beautiful." I murmured examining her ring the next morning.

Apparently Seth had been contemplating about it for quite some time now and after our parents death he knew it was the right thing to do. He didn't want to miss a moment.

Bec was glowing and Seth couldn't stop watching her, obviously proud that he could make the love of his life so happy.

Giving them their desired privacy and escaping the thick atmosphere of utter love I escaped to the office and decided to check my emails and Facebook, something I hadn't gone near for quite some time. I was utterly startled when my notifications on Facebook told me I had a private message form Alice:

To: Taylor Simons

Subject: ...

Hey, don't know if u remember me. I don't know if u still wanna talk, I hope the offer still stands.

I replied instantly:

To: Alice Manyon

Subject: Re: ...

Hey. Uh, sure.

Past weeks have been pretty hectic, but Monday at four?

Meet you out the front of your old school?

Thanks.

I had completely forgotten about my task and James hadn't stopped by. I hadn't been at school though. I hoped he wasn't mad and thinking I had forgotten about him. Even though I had.

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