(Medyo mahaba 'tong chapter. I am not sure but I-ready niyo na ang tissue niyo if ever. hehe. play the song above sa RIGHT scene :) )
Malamig na simoy ng hangin ang bumabalot sa aking balat, I cover myself with my own warmth habang pinagmamasdan ang mga ilaw sa daan. It's already 6 PM and Josh, and I are on our way to Tagaytay. I really don't know where exactly in Tagaytay pero I am quiet familiar in the route.
"Where are we going?" I asked him with all smiles. Bigla naman niyang hinawakan ang kamay ko and he softly massages it with his right hand, while the other is in the steering wheel. Hindi ko alam kung pang-ilan beses ko nang itinanong iyon but instead of answering my question, ngumi-ngiti lang sa akin si Josh. Mas Lalo akong nacu-curious dahil sa bawat pag-ikot ng sasakyan at siyang pagsisimula ng kabog ng dibdib ko.
"Wala ka ba talagang balak sagutin ako?" I pouted at tumawa naman siya like he's amused or something. He stopped his car right infront of a familiar restaurant that we used to eat back when everything was still smooth and fine.
Bigla naman ako nakaramdam ng saya at lungkot, tears were piling up in my eyelids dahil sa nararamdaman ko. Mixed emotions. I don't even know what to say. Napa-tingin ako sa kanya at binigyan niya ako ng isang kakaibang ngiti.
I can tell that his smile is heartbreaking.
"Wag kang umiyak, please. Save your tears later," sabi niya at tuluyang tumulo ang luha sa aking mga mata.
Josh went outside to open the door for me, we both went inside at nakita ko si Miss Ailene; she's the owner of the restaurant at naging close na kami sa kanya dahil lagi kami nandito ni Josh every time we want to chill and just eat.
"Michelle, Josh! It was nice seeing the two of you again." ate Ailene beamed and she welcomed us with a warm hug. "We miss you Ate," I said after breaking the hug. "My schedules are hectic for the past few months dahil sa UAAP," I said and she nodded, "I understand but hey, ang galing mo sa volleyball ha! I am so proud of you, Mich." she said and she leaded the two of us in our favorite spot.
Bigla ko ulit naalala ang first date namin dito. I know it wasn't perfect unlike in romantic movies dahil unexpected ang pagpunta naming dalawa dito. It was raining so hard at wala na kaming mapuntahan na restaurant dahil malapit ng gumabi noon. then, he asked his brother if may alam siyang restaurant but unfortunately, we didn't receive any texts kaya dito kami napadpad. Turns out this place will be our safe haven.
I thought I wouldn't experience being inlove because of my illness. Akala ko sa movies ko lang mapapanood ang mga ganitong bagay but turns out, my fate changed and God gave him to me to teach me some lessons in life. I learned how to appreciate myself even in tough times, I learned how to conquer all things with Christ. I became optimistic and everything changed when I met him. I am so lucky to have him but he's so unlucky to have me. I am a weak girl, hindi ako malakas kagaya ng iba. Maybe the strength that he built for me already broke down when my leukemia came back. Never kong binanggit sa kanya tungkol sa sakit ko. I thought it will be alright, I thought I'll be alright.
But I guess, things are really really complicated.
"Bakit ka umiiyak, babe? Save your tears for later nga eh!" Josh laughed but I know it was a fake one.
"H-hindi ko mapigilan, sorry. Hahahaha," I laughed kahit wala naming nakakatawa then he frowned. "May tanong ako sayo babe."
"Ano 'yun?" He asked without looking at me dahil naka-tingin siya sa menu book.
"What did I do to deserve you?" I asked and he gave me a smile. It was the same smile that he gave me 2 years ago. Ibinaba niya ang menu book at ngumiti muli. "Ano ba naman klaseng tanong 'yan. Ako nga dapat nagta-tanong niyan sayo eh. Nako, babe. Hindi mo lang alam, napaka-swerte ko sayo." He held the top of my hand and kisses it.