His Badass Mute

Chapter 15: Sad Sniffles

Sometimes I wish I could read her mind but then I wonder if I'll be strong enough to know the truth.

Damien

I woke up today from my room being illuminated with the sun, cascading on every part of the room. I loved that it was bright, but I didn't like that it made my room hotter. I sat up in my bed with my basketball shorts stuck to the back of my thighs.

I stood up, stretching my sore arms from a work out I did the day before. A sudden realization hit me. I didn't have a dream or if I did, I couldn't remember it.

I had fun yesterday with Mae. Despite her falling asleep halfway through the movie, I felt her shake from laugher, occasionally letting a sound slip through her silent laughs.

She tried hiding but her ears peaked out of her hair, making her look sort of like a pixie. I smiled fondly at the thought. She was cute. I laid back on my bed, letting my legs hang off the side of my bed.

Mae. I couldn't keep her off my mind. I kept thinking back to last night. Bennett suggested we wake her, but I didn't want to so they put on another movie. I loved the way she slept. How peaceful she looked. It was more peaceful than I could have slept.

The way my arms were around her, making me at ease; maybe even her as well. I didn't feel the need to protect anyone. I didn't feel on edge because I thought something bad was going to happen.

'Apart of me does feel bad because I have a voice that others dream of having yet I still choose not to use it. But if you've lived through what I've lived through. Been through what I've been through, maybe you'd be silent too.' Mae's words repeated again in my head.

I couldn't help but worry about her. What if something happened to her, and I couldn't protect her?

You weren't there. You couldn't have protected her. I thought.

I knew I was right, but I couldn't help think maybe in some way, I could have helped her, if not save her. When I went downstairs after showering and getting dressed, I saw my friends.

"Why are you smiling?" Ryder asked, curiosity ringing in his voice, bringing me out of my daze as I sat down. I shrugged and pretended to not know what he meant. Although Ryder was the smartest out of the three of us, I had to admit that even the youngest one, Bennett, had me beat and took second as the smartest. He loved to read and did that often when we had nothing else to do. An entire conversation could be held with him while he was reading but he wouldn't hear any of it until you called his name.

"Would it happen to be about a girl?" Bennett raised his right eyebrow. Arrogance flooded his face as I stayed composed. Not showing any emotion to him was actually an answer on its own.

"Not just any girl," Ryder mused, grinning lopsidedly. They both stared at me, waiting for me to confirm what they've been trying to insinuate.

"Why am I friends with you guys again?" I joked, teasing their feelings, knowing that I could distract them enough to stall the inevitable conversation. They knew I liked Mae. They've always known and held nothing against me for only ever wanting something with her.

Ryder occasionally teased me about my... virtue still being intact but nowadays you either were or weren't a virgin. There was nothing shameful about it, so I felt no pressure or insecurity when he teased me about it.