just a dream (camren)

ten

October 18th 2016

Camila taps on the table, a nervous tick of hers, as she waits for Lucy to show up. The other girl had been AWOL, and the only contact Camila had with her was a text, asking to meet at this specific coffee shop after school on Tuesday.

Lauren hadn't seen Lucy either, and Camila can see how stressed and upset it's making her, which is something she's going to address when Lucy arrives. It's not fair that Lucy is making Lauren so confused and hurt, because this Lauren is completely innocent.

She sips on her hot chocolate, double checking her phone to make sure she's in the right place, but she doesn't have to worry when Lucy walks through the doors and spots her. The older girl smiles at her and pulls out the chair across the small table Camila had chosen.

"Hey," Lucy greets her, shrugging her coat off, "sorry I kind of disappeared, I just can't be around Lauren right now and she's so... persistent."

Camila worries her bottom lip between her teeth. "You need to talk to her. None of this is fair on her."

"What am I supposed to say?" Lucy sends her an incredulous look. "Hi, Lauren. I'm not actually your girlfriend, I'm from another universe and god knows where this version of me has gone. Also, my version of you cheated on me and that's why I can't look at you anymore. Sorry. She'd get me sent to an asylum."

Camila sighs. "I know you can't tell her the truth, but you need to say something. Avoiding her is hurting her way more than... than a clean breakup would. It's not fair on her."

"Since when do you care about what's fair to her?" Lucy snaps. "You're the one who left Lauren and the other girls struggling. They had no idea if they'd be able to go on without you. You don't know how many times Lauren cried to me about it, so you can't talk about what's fair when you did that."

"I was depressed," Camila glares, annoyed that she has to tell someone clearly still biased her reasoning. "I was fucking depressed and trapped somewhere I couldn't express myself. Sue me for wanting to be fucking happy for once."

To her credit, Lucy looks chastised, but it doesn't take her long to bounce back. "You could've just told them that and you know it. They were your sisters at one point. You know they would've done everything they could to help you."

Camila feels the familiar sting of tears at her eyes, but she holds them back. Towards the end, after I Know What You Did Last Summer, she felt like she couldn't talk to the girls about anything, let alone her mental health, something so private to her.

"Look, fighting about this isn't going to help anything." Camila finally answers. "We're both here for a reason and we need to figure it out."

"You're right, we shouldn't argue," Lucy relents, shrugging, "you came here after leaving Fifth Harmony. I came here after leaving Lauren. There's a pretty obvious connection here."

"What, you think it's all about Lauren?" Camila frowns. "We're supposed to battle to the death for her affections or something?"

"No," Lucy studies her, and Camila realises she's probably wondering why she'd come to that conclusion. "We both lost a friend on the nights we left, right? Well, you lost four friends. Before we dated, Lauren and I were best friends, and we were both sceptical about dating in case we broke up and never spoke again. After she hurt me I told her I never wanted to see her again. I lost my girlfriend and my best friend in one night. Maybe I'm supposed to fix things with her. Our friendship, I mean."

Camila frowns. "Aren't you in love with her, though?"

"She was the first person I ever truly loved, yeah," Lucy agrees with her, and Camila's heart sinks; she'd had a little bit of hope that Lucy would say no. "But I value our friendship just as much, and even though she hurt me... I'll always want that idiot in my life. Maybe I'm here to rebuild our friendship. You're probably here to fix things with the girls too. Lauren in particular."