21 8 29

today and yesterday we had to take some "practice tests" for the tests we have to take at the end of the year and I was really stressed out about that for some reason. I'm good now?

Certain commercials on tv make me want to bang my head on the wall because they make me incredibly uncomfortable and I've seen so much Miraculous Ladybug on Disney Chanel it frustrates me. so fun

I just feel shitty?? idk why and my parents are brushing it off because I act like that a lot. But sometimes I'm in a mellow mood sometimes I'm genuinely not okay

My dad doesn't understand "I'm not comfortable please stop". This morning he put his hand over me and I just didn't want him to so I told him to remove it and he said ok and didn't move. Then I said "dad? your arm?" he said "yeah" and still didn't move. Then my mom came in and I snapped but I explained her everything and she understood

Also they planned some stuff for when we go to Canada and I just don't feel comfortable going places just to visit I know it's weird I don't get it either. I'm totally fine with sitting in a hotel room for 6 full days, thank you. They didn't even ask me if I wanted to visit those places

And I hate my hair and my face and no matter how many people tell me they like it I won't change my mind

Als I saw a recording of an acoustic Palaye thing that I'm gonna go to and it made me really anxious and I feel like I don't want to go anymore

I got used to talking to you guys about my problems and I don't feel okay when I don't

I'm on my dad's computer and it keeps correcting me and it's frustrating 

I feel like I shouldn't even put this chapter up because it's really negative and all

Evening Wear // ifRead this story for FREE!