"Hey, can you guys stay down here and wait for the pizza to come? I'm going to go take a shower because somebody got me all soaked." I stared accusingly at Zander.

"Yeah, of course," Jackie said. I nodded and went upstairs to my room, closing the door. I grabbed my towel and went into the bathroom, stripping off my wet clothes. I made the water as hot as I could stand and let the hot water relax my muscles and warm my body.

I used my strawberry scented shampoo and conditioner, massaging my scalp thoroughly. While I was finishing in the shower, my ex- boyfriend, Shane popped into my mind. He was my first REAL boyfriend, not that stupid elementary school stuff.

We loved each other. Or so I thought. When I found out that he cheated on me. . . There aren't words for it. I was totally crushed and heartbroken. Then to make it worse, he just left. Didn't say goodbye or anything, he was just gone. Regardless I still can't stop thinking about him and that song I made up for how it was when I first met him 4 years ago. The lyrics keep running through my head again and again.

I'm missing you so much,

I'll see you die tonight.

Just so I can get to you, before the sun will rise.

I know the signs are on and I feel this too.

None of that ever seems to matter when I'm holding you.

And I'm wasting away, away from you.

And I'm wasting away, away from you.

What have I, gotten into this time around?

I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again,

But I didn't have to,

You had me at hello.

I have never seen a smile that can light the room like yours.

It's simply radiant,

I feel more with everyday that goes by.

I watch the clock so I can make my timing just right.

Would it be ok, would it be ok,

If I took your breath away.

When I finished in the shower, I turned the water off and wrapped myself in the towel and stepped into my room and over to my dresser. I opened one of my drawers and got out a black bra and matching underwear. I put them on with soccer shorts and a black spaghetti strap shirt. Right as I pulled the shirt down, Jackie and Zander came in with the pizza. "There is a thing called knocking you know," I said as they came in.

"Yeah but we don't use it," Zander said and set the pizza on my bed. I sat down bed and leaned against my pillows, not touching the box. "Aren't you going to eat?" he asked.

"No, I'm not really hungry anymore." He shrugged it off and didn't push me on it. Jackie looked at me and I nodded at her, encouraging her to eat. After a minute, she picked up a slice and started chewing on it, eyeing me occasionally. I just sat back and stared off into space, thinking about Shane. Even though he broke my heart and left, he still gives me butterflies when I think about him.

He wasn't the kind of guy that called you hot or sexy, or wanted you to be someone else. He was sweet and was something different. He made me feel wanted and accepted in the world, he made me feel loved. He practically took everything from me: my first kiss, first love, everything. Everything except my virginity, which I still have besides the fact that I'm a junior. He was everything I could have wanted and still is even though he isn't here. I can't stop myself from thinking he's going to come back, even though I know that he won't, but there is the slim chance he will. I shouldn't get my hopes up though.

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