Sage

this is my life

i wake up to a loud noise a crash downstairs, i jump up out of bed hurting my arm then i fall down and everything goes black.

       i wake up with tubes in my arm again, i look around the cold room wih green accents, the hospital again i look over to see my mother waiting patiently for me to wake up. she looks at me and i sigh. "its ok, i accidentally dropped the chair, your sister saved you thank her!" mother said, i look over to see my sister, melina her dark brown hair, her amber eyes staring straight at me. she smiles and hands me chocolate, my favorite.

     "you almost had a streak bro." she giggled with me. i laugh too.  i look down at the tubes in my arm,  always see the scar from the tubes, my scars from anorexia the ever ending war! 

   anorexia is what i have to live with everyday for the rest of my life. i know im skin and bones, i look at my chicken legs, and hold back tears. my sister melina holds up money and gestures me to follow her. i get up and undo the tubes. "youve been here for 5 hours." melina smiled at me. 

    i follow her down stairs and she brings me to the cafe. "pick what ever you want sage." i smile and run straight towards the candy, my sister smiles and reaches for a pack of gum and i reach for kit-kat bites. the cafe i empty cause its so early in the morning and none of the patients are up yet.

      my sister smiles and leads me toward the breakfast foods. "can you go get us a booth?" Melina asks me. "sure." i smile and walk over, my sister brings her food back. shes lactose and tolerant so she cant have milk. 

        she texts mom to meet her downstairs, she lets me have a bite of her toast. "mom will be down in a minute i don't want to loose the table." Melina drank her orange juice while going through her snap chat, her boy freind labeled as 'bae' sent her a snap, the caption was, imysm. with a heart eyes and kissie face emoji.

      "whats imysm mean Mel?" i ask. "it means i miss you so much." Melina replied. mom comes downstairs and sat at the table. mom is dressed something tells me that we are going to be here all day.

      "do you like yogurt?" Melina suggests. "do they have oats or strawberry sauce?" i ask. "i think they had the old fashioned sauce at our table, ill ask for oats." Mel says. "get some cereal and go wait by mom, not too light but not too sugary either." Melina smiles. i go to the cereal  and look at the lightly frosted corn flakes. 

            i grab a plastic bowl and pour my cereal and whole milk. i take a spoon and go sit down. a girl my age walks in, light brunette hair and crystal blue eyes, i wave and she smiles, to my suprise she has half an arm, i smile and walk to my table.

      my sister grins at me and i know whats going to come out of her mouth. "so whos the girl?" Melina giggles. "no one.." i hold back a blush. "im going to call darian up." darians my old dad my step dad is Noah peters, my step mom is alondra simmons soon to be, alondra jhonson.

        mom steps out of the room to make the call,i know my dads going to cry, any time i show signs of anorexia he starts to cry,  I dont like it hen anyone cries about me, im getting better slowly, very slowly. Noah works here too, he likes to suprise me with muffins whenever i visit. 

      "hey buddy hello princess, weres your mom?" i hear Noah say. he sits by us. "moms calling up dad, darian." i smile. Noah smiles too, but its a nice smile not a nervous smile. i eat some of my yogurt, its grains not oats but im not to picky, i grab the strawberry sauce and pour it onto my yogurt.

       "um have you seen a brown haired teenage boy, i went to the bathroom and forgot to tell him.." the little girl i waved to comes over she looks at me and i hold back blush. 

      "my name is harper i kind of live here, the  boy looks like me." she said. "sit with us and wait for him." Mel gestures. "whats his name?" i ask. "Dane, his name is dane,hes very tall or im just very short." harper giggled. "dane? im his girlfreind." Mel said as she whipped out her phone and texted dane harpers with them. then i see dane run downstairs. "there you are ive been looking everywere for you!" dane sighed. 

       "Mel!" he said, my sister waves. "i have to get this little monster upstairs she needs to do testing." dane waved bye and so did harper.

       " i wont tell dane about your crush." Mel teases me. noah smiles. "is it harper?" he smiles. "shes my patient and i need to do the testing tell darla ill stop by later." Noah hugs me and mel then gets up and runs upstairs.

      "i like harper now EVERYONE all the sudden knows harper. my sister giggles and pats my head. "darians coming at lunch, ill eat with you guys too." Mother says as she sits down. i eat my cereals, its so good here. then i eat some yogurt.

      i finish and have to go upstairs, to put stupid tubes in my arms. mom heads upstairs first and Mel hands me a musket bar, "thanks sis." i say. "no problem but hurry and eat it before mom sees." i unfold the wrapper and bite into the soft chocolate bar. 

       i throw the wrapper into the hospital room trash bin. mom picks me up and does Airplane into the bed, she tucks me into the hospital bed, sis turns on the TV, "wait i love teen titans go!" i say before she changes it, "t-e-e-n-t-i-t-a-n-s teen titans LETS GO!" i sing along to the theme song. she giggles and takes a snap selfie and captions it, with this one, and smiley emojis.

        "there was a birth at the hospital today!" mom says i clap and watch the show, my sister walks into the bathroom looking at her phone, she looks like shes gonna cry. "Mel?" i ask for my sister. "i need a minute, ill be back in a second sage." she says. i look at the TV and just watch, i pull out my phone and send my streaks.

        i see my sister run out of the hospital room and gestures for mom to come outside. she walks out. she hugs my mom crying and i can hear her mention suicide. Harlow committed suicide. that's all i can hear from outside. Harlow was my sisters childhood best friend.

        Mel comes back into the room as mom follows, Mels face is covered in tears and running mascara. she looks at the clock and pushes over the iv and feeding tubes. i shut my eyes as she pushes the needle into my arms mom lets me squeeze her hand. 

       Melina hugs me. "i shouldnt tell you this but my friend, Harlow she commited suicide..." my sister says as she takes a breath and looks through her phone, holding back her tears. i look at the tv and wonder, why.why does suicide happen?

       "why does suicide happen?" i ask as i look at my mother then my sister. "some people feel trapped and feel as though they have nothing left." melina sighs. i look out the window. "mom can we go home?" i ask. mother turns around. "yes sweetie but your going to alondras for the weekend," mother pauses, "your father will be out for the weekend you will see him when he comes back, congragulate him, he got the promotion." mother said as she turns back around and talks on the phone. 

       melina walks over o the bathroom to fix her makeup. "ok your free to go madam, i want you to comeback next weekend for more tests to check up on sage," the doctor cleared his throat "i would recommend therapy, heres the best place." the doctor handed mom a white and baby blue car with the therapists number on in.

    more doctors.. i thought to my self as i look up. this is my life..

(sage is a boy)