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Looking out into the water was always such a peaceful moment for me

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Looking out into the water was always such a peaceful moment for me. Back home in Florida we had some of the best beaches. As a kid I would spend so many hours just sitting contemplating. I had a strange obsession with the ocean. Any body of water really. Moving to Boston was one of my dreams... the city life, four seasons, and some great colleges but the beaches, well most of them, left something to be desired. Still here I am inhaling the scent of this murky water thinking about all the things that led me here.

I really need to get myself together. Life is finally starting to look up and I'm out here about to miss out on a huge opportunity. I swear I'm my own worst enemy at times.

Ring ring.....ring ring

This phone won't shut the hell up. I can't even get my thoughts together. My head is pounding. I look down at my legs. My smooth butterscotch legs are bruised and covered in blood and dirt. I try to reach down to clean myself off but it's as if my brain and my hands are not part of the same body. I take a deep, labored breath and try to gather my thoughts. I am so frustrated. I swallow and the metallic taste of blood quickly takes over my mouth. I slightly gag at the taste.

As I'm trying to focus my mind on the simple task of moving and getting myself together. I hear whispering.

"Who's there?" what I tried to say and all I got was a gasp and a crushing pain to my ribs.

WHAT THE FUCK....why can't I scream, why can't I move.

Slowly, a thought comes to me... A memory of sorts. I feel nauseous. I'm laying in a dark closed off space. I can't stretch or move. I can barely breath. I run my fingernails across what feels to be a carpet-like material. I feel some of the fibers stick to my broken nail. I'm bouncing around like I'm in motion. Like I'm on a road to somewhere but have no recollection of where I am or how I got there. The faint smell of gasoline permeates my nose. I feel sleepy but not tired at the same time. I am so confused.

Think Nicolette's Thursday and I'm supposed to be at the student center meeting Romario. We were going to drive to New York to meet his family. I was sure he was going to propose. He's been acting so weird lately that I know he is up to something. I mean, yeah, we're young and these things don't always work out but Romario and I will be the exception. He is the first man that didn't only care about my looks and body but my mind and soul. My mind drifts back to that dark, bouncy place. I felt myself jolt as if startled by the increasingly loud but muffled music I hear. "Turn right towards Blue Hills Parkway"...the sound interrupted the music.

I come back to my current state as I hear what sounds like leaves rustling and sticks cracking under the pressure of someone's feet. " Come your fucking eyes", i say to myself. At that moment I could feel my eyes opening but it was still dark. It was night. I tried again to move only to be be met by pain and disappointment. It's like the dreams I used to have constantly. Where you are awake in bed and you try to move and you can't. It feels like someone or something is holding you down. You try to scream and nothing comes out. You can't open your eyes. All you can do is hear your thoughts and pray. That is how I feel now but the difference is I know I'm not sleep.

What have I done? Where am I? Who is here with me?

Suddenly I fight the heaviness that is weighing on my eyes and peek up again. This time I see a face. This face is familiar. Like not just a face I've seen but a face I know. The look on this face is different though. The look of hate, betrayal, and pure evil.

Just as I tried to call out the name to this face, I see something shiny. It kind of hurts my eyes to focus on it but I finally make it out. It's a gun. Again, I try to call out a name. At that instant, a shot rings out.

Oh familiar face. You have done it now. You have really messed up big time. I mean I know I haven't been the best person in life. I have a group of friends and from some of things I have done, anyone of them have motive to want me dead. Some valid reasons. But familiar face, you might feel relieved now. I mean since you just killed me and all but I know who you are and soon everyone will know, too.

If only you knew what you just did.


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