Carnival Heart

Chapter Twenty Five- " she's my bestfriend "

    I didn't sleep at all last night, all I could think about was Judy and if she would ever talk to me again.
    My alarm buzzed from all the way across the room, I got up and picked up my phone from the floor. There was a small crack in it, i'm surprised it didn't fully break.

    Beth- hey do you need a ride?
    Judy- no i'm getting on from my mom
    Beth- oh.. Ok

    I got dressed and walked out to the kitchen.
    " we don't need to give Judy a ride today, her moms giving her one " I said,
    " ok " Cole said.
    I sat down at the table and just looked into my tea.
    " you ok? " Cole asked, I looked up at him.
    " what? " I said.
    " are you ok? " he asked again.
    " oh... yeah.... I'm fine " I smiled.
    " you sure? ".
    " yeah.... I'm sure " I smiled.
    " should we get going? " I asked.
    " yeah we should " he said.
    We got in the car, Cole drove today.
    We pulled up to the school, I just sat there still in the car.
    " Bethany, you coming? " Cole asked.
    " what? Yeah " I said.
    " are you sure your ok? " he asked again as we walked into the school.
    " i'm fine just tried, I had a bad sleep last night " I said.
    " maybe have a better sleep tonight " he said patting me on the back before walking away.
    I stopped in my tracks to see Judy standing by our lockers.
    " hey " I walked up to her.
    " hi " she said.
    " what are you doing here, well your lockers here too, but are you ok? " I asked.
    " i'm fine, I just came to tell you that we can still make the music just text me the song your thinking of and i'll make a beat " she said.
    " does that mean your not coming to Ottawa with me anymore? " I asked.
    " no I can't " she said.
    " but yes you can " I said.
    " I like my best friend Beth, and to see her with someone else it hurts so no I can't come with you to Ottawa sorry " she said walking away.
    " Judy! " I called out.
    " trouble in paradise? " Grace said, I took one last look at Judy as she walked down the hallway, I took a breath and turned to look at Grace.
" fuck off " I said.
" I don't think your brother would like to hear that your told me to fuck off " she smiled.
" I don't care go ahead and tell him, you're the one making me tell you to fuck off, you're the one who's making me be mean to you, you're the one dating my brother so your in my life by doing that, so how about for once you worry about your life and get the fuck out of mine ".
" oh and stay the fuck away from me " I added before walking down the hallway.
Ok I have to admit that felt good to get that out.
I walked into the classroom to see Judy sitting in the one extra spot in the corner of the room.
I sat down in my normal spot, a couple minutes after I sat down Chance walked into the room.
" why is Judy over there and why did you look so angry when you walked in here? " he asked.
" Judy likes me and I told Grace to fuck off " I said.
" wait backup, Judy likes you " he said raising his eyebrows, I turned to look at him.
" yeah, and now she's not talking to me, but she says she'll still make music for the band so that's a good thing right? " I asked trying not to cry.
" I don't know what to say " he said.
" it's ok, I don't know what to say either, Judy and I have every class together, she's my best friend and now I don't have her " I said.
" are you ok? " he asked.
" I keep saying i'm fine, but i'm not, part of my life is gone, it's all gone " I said looking over at Judy.

I sat down in english class, " why is Judy over there? " Brendon asked.
" she's sick and she didn't want to get us sick " I lied.
" oh ok, I hope she feels better " he said.
" me too, I hope she comes back over soon " I smiled.
I looked over at her and we made eye contact, I gave a small smile, but she looked away, I looked back down at my lap and held back tears that wanted to break out.

I walked home, I was cold, but I didn't care all I could think about was if Judy was ever going to talk to me again.
I walked through the door and saw Cole standing right there with his arms crossed.
" why did you tell Grace to Fuck off? " he asked, I set down my bag and took off my shoes and jacket.
" i've had the worst day, i'm not fighting with you right now " I said still holding back tears.
" and what do you mean by that? You just told my girlfriend to fuck off and get out of your life " he said.
" she is in my life 24/7 and I had had enough so please Cole we can not fight today, today has been the worst day ever " I said.
" what do you mean by that? " he asked crossing his arms.
I looked away, " I found out that my best friend is gay and she likes me and now she's not talking to me and I have no idea how to handle it, I almost cried every class when I look at her " I said tears finally coming out, Cole walked over to me and gave me a hug.
We sat down on the couch.
" is that why she ran out yesterday? " he asked, I nodded.
" and why you hardly talked all morning? " he asked, I nodded.
" you should have said something " he said.
" I didn't want to " I said.
" why not? " he asked.
" she's my best friend and I didn't want to believe it " I said.
" but it hit me this morning when she said it was too hard to be around me " I said.
" Beth, she's your best friend, your best friend, she wouldn't give that up " he said.
" but she did " I said.
" no she didn't, she can't live without you " he said.
" she will come back, it will just take time " he said.
I nodded.
" i'm going to get you water " he said.

Cole came back with the water, " i'll call you in sick to work, but is it ok if I go out for a little bit? " Cole asked.
" yeah go out, i'm not stopping you " I smiled.
" ok " he said before walking out the door.
A couple minutes went by I was sitting on the couch watching some Riverdale when there was a knock at the door. I paused the show.
" who is it?! " I yelled.
" Brendon! ".
" come in! " I yelled.
" what are you doing here? " I asked.
" what are you doing not a work " he said walking over to sit beside me.
" i'm guessing Cole called you and told you everything " I said.
" yeah " he nodded, " why didn't you tell me? ".
" I was scared " I said.
" of what? " he asked.
" how you would react to it " I said.
" your best friend just stopped talking to you, and you were scared of how I was going to reach " he said.
" yeah " I looked down.
" you don't have to be scared to tell me stuff " he said.
" I know " I said.
" if you knew then why did you tell me " he said.
" sorry " I said.
" don't say sorry, I know you most likely just didn't want to talk about it " he said.
" yeah " I said.
" Judy's your best friend she can't stay away forever " he said.
" that's was Cole said " I said.
" that's because it true " he smiled.
I leaned over and gave him a hug.
He kissed me on my forehead, at least I still have him and Chance who I can talk to and hangout with.
I leaned back.
" do want to watch riverdale with me " I smiled.
" sure, I haven't watched that show in a long time " he smiled.
I pressed play.
I leaned on Brendon's shoulder, I was luckily to have him in my life, really luckily.