Surviving

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Surviving

Years of solitary desolation,

Worlds of pain, and anguish and angst,

Taking turns to spread my faults in a long unending table,

Cynically mocking every step I took wrong.

I breathe in fire, but I sigh out ice,

Everything I touch turns not to gold but to charcoal.

Despair spreads its cruel wings around my sullen heart...

And I weep,

For all I've lost and all I've done.

For I know that deep inside everything in me is dead.

Cold, stiff, and dead are all hopes of my happiness.

A simple word,

A simple plead,

Please let me burn in the flames,

Please let me freeze in the darkness,

Allow me to feel something,

Bend this fixture of nothingness,

Or by god, don't let me let me live at all.

For I've only been surviving and life I've never known.

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