Why I'm a credible source all in one video.
You can also read on their Wattpad profile about my experience on The Bachelor.
Here are the thoughts I had while watching this week's Bachelor. Must I warn you about spoilers?
First off, I was in Paris before The Bachelor. I still am, and it doesn't seem like Mikaela has any plans to change that soon.
Bekah M. sometimes reminds me of Iris even though she's two years older. I think at twenty-two you can be ready for marriage, considering my brother is twenty-two and is expected to marry. All right, required to marry.
During Chris Harrison's talk with Arie, Arie had excellent eye contact going on. Iris could learn a thing or two.
Krystal has been convinced of her connection with Arie since her date during the first week of dates. The first week of dates. Do I need to say more?
I should pay attention to these dates. Maybe I can get ideas for Vienna and me. Lauren even looks like Vienna. They better keep an eye out for Amoris. The old architecture in Paris is remarkable. I think Lauren might be too awestruck by it to talk.
We all know Krystal is going to have a two on one. I feel like she could fit in at the Society, but I rather hope that doesn't happen.
Arie kind of looks like my father.
Now I'm seeing my father and Vienna having a dinner date rather than Arie and Lauren. This date needs to end immediately.
After that line about being terrified about not opening up enough, Arie will look like a jerk if he doesn't give her the rose.
All right, she got the rose, but I am not shipping this because I can't handle seeing what looks like my father and Vienna kiss. That's completely understandable, I think.
Let's keep Bently away from any burlesque shows. This is one rose Tia does not want. She's lying about wanting to get the rose to dance on stage. I know Becca K. is a predicted winner, but the two haven't had much of a connection that we've seen in a while. I think Bekah M. cared more about getting the rose to be on stage during the show than to dance with Arie.
I know Mikaela hates the two-on-ones but I enjoy them.
Krystal is not wife material for anyone in the Society. Though if Bently got stuck with her, that might be entertaining. Does Krystal have to "mmmmm" when she hugs Arie? I'm very disturbed.
The hedge maze at the Estate is more impressive. Kendall is Iris—getting lost in mazes. He clinked Krystal's glass first. It's a sign. Krystal is trying to seduce and manipulate Arie; any self-respecting man can see that. Vienna wasn't even as obvious as Krystal. I support sabotage but it needs to be skillfully done. The whole time she talked about Kendall not being able to fall in love, you could tell that she was lying.
Was I the only one who just fell in love with Kendall? (Editor's Note: He better pray Vienna doesn't read this.)
That view of the Eiffel Tower through the window. . . Kendall has her quirks but she is incredibly mature.
Iris just threw her popcorn when Kendall got the rose.
Who is Jacqueline?
Was this what it was like when Erik took Iris shopping for a black dress?
Are they drinking scotch over wine?
What is the place the rose ceremony is at? Iris would be terrified. Correction: looking at her she is terrified.
I say Jenna and Seinne go home.
Jenna was sent home, but I did not see Chelsea going home.
I had a suspicion Arie loved red wine.
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The Bachelor (TM) According to ColtonNon-Fiction
I feel it's time I give my opinion of The Bachelor. Afterall, my brother had the same nickname as one of the Bachelorettes, and I was unfortunately even a contestant.* Mikaela might try to take credit for this idea, but it's my idea. I wanted to be...