I'm just sorry [Nagisa Shiota]

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Sorry, I'm not For you

Sorry, I'm not Her

Sorry, I'm not PERFECT

Sorry, I'm not that good


Sorry, I'm not okay



Sorry, I exist


"You're not depressed,

you're just sad."


Yes. I'm just sad.  Sad for 4 years.  Sad for thinking about death almost everyday. Sad because I'm still alive.

But why do I deserve this? I've tried so hard, wishing I could do better. If only I could save her, he would be happy now. I was never meant to be with him. I trudged up the mountain, carrying a bouquet of flowers and a box.

I thank him for saving my life, the time when I tried to suicide. I also hate him for that. I miss him a lot, he's now with her. Nagisa is with her, in a better place together. I was never meant to be the one with you. To spend my whole life.

I looked into the box, thousands of letters addressed to somebody special, supposed to be for me... but was never as it was never sent and addressed to.


"Dear Y/N,

How are you today? The weather is really warm today. I hope to visit you soon!

Love, Nagisa"


Nagisa had these letters and when I read them I didn't know what to say. I found them everywhere around his apartment, the more letters I found it became even worse. I shouldn't be peeking at them because he hadn't given them to me. I suppose I was never supposed to receive them. They were neatly written, I had only recently discovered them.I felt betrayed as he didn't tell me, never sending me a letter.

I was tempted as the letter was not addressed to anybody, opening I begun to read it. Over whelmed with many emotions as I continued to read each letter.


"Dear Y/N,

My condition is getting worse, I have to go to the hospital soon. I know you're never going to receive these letters but I love you a lot. I many have a few months left.

From, Nagisa."


I smiled at the letter, it was pretty sweet. I held the box as I walked up the mountain, I'm glad I was wearing a thick jumper. I felt sad, he didn't tell me the truth about his condition.


"Dear Y/N,

You'll never receive these letters so why am I even bothering to write this? I hope in the future you can read them somehow. Sorry for leaving you alone, I hope you can forgive me.

From, Nagisa"

Arriving up the top of the mountain was two graves.

One for a boy, Nagisa Shiota, who passed away from an inevitable disease. The other was L/N Y/N, who was caught in an unfortunate accident. I placed the box and flowers in between the grave stone.

 A tear slid down my cheek, it was never me who would stand by him.


I would never be as perfect as her.

I miss you a lot.

I know you won't come back, I'm just sorry.


I turned around and ran down the mountain, my green hair was flowing behind me and I didn't bother to look back.


I'm just....


Sorry.

...

i want to drop this book for several reasons.

i've been highly unmotivated, my work isn't good there are better assclass authors out there (yes i'm aware) and here i am? producing low quality crap. I'm so bad... I'm sorry


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