march 18th, 2018.
st. baldrick's, the organization that funded research for childhood cancer.
i had shaved my head two times before, and i just had to do it again, loving the feeling it gave me to have a shaved head.
i sat in the chair next to others who were also shaving their heads for cancer. i twiddled my fingers, my stomach in knots.
i looked into the crowd, spotting ethan smiling at me, his camera faced at me, clearly ready to snapchat the moment.
"you ready?" the woman shaving my head spoke into my ear, making sure i heard her over the loud music and chatter of the pub the event was being held in.
i gave a quick nod and heard the razor buzz from behind me, closing me eyes and smiling while she reached to my forehead and shaved a stripe down the middle of my head.
i opened my eyes again to see ethan with a huge smile on his face, and when we made eye contact, he gave me a thumbs up and mouthed
"i'm so proud of you."
i giggled as she continued to shave my head, seeing the hair fall to the ground.
the ordeal only lasted a minute or two, the lady behind me snapping the cloak buttons and waving it off me, my hands instantly flying to my, now bald, head.
i walked off the stage i was on, finding my way to ethan as i held his hands outstretched to enclose me in a hug. his hands of course finding their way to my head, running his hands over the peach fuzz.
"it's so soft!" he exclaimed, rubbing his hands all over my head, making me giggle.
"did you see my story?" he said, and i gave him a confused expression.
"i've only been off the stage for like a minute e, have you seen me on my phone?" i said sarcastically, making him smile and roll his eyes. he pulled out his phone and clicked on his story, a video of me on the stage poppin up with the caption,
"so proud of this girl."
i kissed his cheek and grabbed his hand, making my way out into the cold air of new york in the winter.
that night we had gone out to a celebratory dinner. i wore a tight, deep red dress that went down to my mid thigh.
the dinner was good, but i was very much looking forward to going home and just cuddle up in a cozy blanket.
when we pulled into the driveway of our shared apartment, i ran into our apartment and slipped out of my dress into a sweatshirt and pajama shorts, grabbing a fuzzy blanket from our bed.
ethan was seated in his spot on the couch as i sat down next to him, leaning my head on his shoulder and pulling the blanket over both of us.
his hands went to my head again, rubbing it back and forth.
"you sure like my new haircut, don't you?"
"mhm," he responded. "you're my little