Chapter 17

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Addy was in the infirmary, with Jace at her side, and a Silent Brother looking at her hand.

Jace used an iratze to heal her minor cuts. But the medics called in a Silent Brother to look at her hand.

Your left hand will never be the same, it's healed, but it's never going to be at it's full strength

"What do you mean?" Jace asked.

Her hand is crippled. She can still use it, fight with it, but it's never going to be the same. She can train with it, but at times it might still cause her pain

"Okay" Addy squeaked.

"Thank you" Jace said.

Your welcome Jace Morgenstern and Addison Blackthorn.

The Silent Brother left. Walking out of the Institute.

"I'm going to go see Isabelle" Addy said sitting up.

"Okay, Addy, I love you Okay? Don't let what Valentine said bring you down" Jace said

"I love you to Jace, but I'm just scared" Addy said.

"It's okay" Jace said. "I'll be in my room, do easy on that hand"

"Okay"

Addy walked out of the infirmary. Slowly trudging her way to the room where Izzy was.

She saw the glances given to her by the other Shadowhunters in the Institute. She picked up her pace and ran to the room where Izzy was.

She opened the door with so much force and slammed it behind her and suck to her feet. Tears and mascara running down her face.

"Addy! What happened!" Izzy asked. Addy looked up to see Izzy and Alec. Both looking at her with concern.

"I-I— J-Jace is Clary's b-brother... Clary f-found her mom— and there was no M-Micheal W-Wayland... Only Valentine— I'm an e-experiment, I broke m-my hand— IM A BLACKTHORN" She sobbed.

"Addy, oh, by the Angel, come here" Izzy said. Izzy wrapped her arms around the sobbing girl.

"Your a Blackthorn?" Alec asked "What do you mean by experiment? What happened to you hand?"

Izzy helped Addy up and led her to the couch. She then wiped Addy's tears and instructed her to take a deep breath.

"Valentine was posing as Michael Wayland, Jace is actually Valentines son, so that makes him Clary's Brother. Valentine told me he used me as an experiment, he put Angel blood in me, giving me more powers than most Shadowhunters... I used the angelic power from my rune and the seraph blade and made this force, pushing Valentine back, only Valentine too, Jace and Clary were unharmed, and then he got away— he told me I was a Blackthorn, he broke my hand" Addy explained.

"This is a lot to take in" Alec said, running a hand through his raven black hair.

"What happened to you hand" Izzy asked

"I attacked Valentine, and me and him battled, he kicked the sword out of my hand. Shattering it, It will never be the same. It will never have its full strength, Izzy, I'm crippled" she said putting her face in her hands.

"No your not, your still the best fighter I know, Okay?" Izzy said

"It seems to me, that when you knocked Valentine back with your— powers— you only had anger directed at him, maybe when you show pure anger or emotion you can use this power" Alec said

"Why do you think that?" Izzy asked her brother.

"Only Valentine got hurt, not Clary, not Jace, only him, you were angry at him right" Alec asked. Addy only nodded in her response.

"Have you told anyone, about you being a Blackthorn?" Izzy asked

"Clary knows, you guys, Jace, and the Silent Brother That healed me." She explained.

"It's going to be okay" Izzy coed, causing Addy to whimper. Alec sat down on the other side of Addy.

"She's right, everything's going to be fine" Alec said wrapping his arms around both her and Isabelle.

No it's not, she wanted to say. But she didn't.

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Addy laid in bed staring up and the plain colored roof.

The blanket was wrapped around her waist. Her hair was fanned out around her. She felt like someone in a mundane hospital.

Addy felt completely and utterly weak. Her left wrist sending ripples of pain throughout her hand and wrist with any sudden movement.

I have to gather up my strength, for my hand

I'm a Blackthorn.

There's a family out there. Waiting for me. Grieving for me. Wanting me to come home.

Dammit.

Why can't I get over this.

I'm weak.

What would my real blood family think of me, sulking in bed, a pathetic excuse for a Shadowhunter

Addy quickly turned to her side. Sending a wave of pain from her wrist. She sat up gasping, clutching her wrist like it's going to help.

The pain was terrible. She squeezed her eyes shut. Tears brimmed her eyes. She got up and out of bed and walked barefoot to the kitchen.

Opening the freezer she took out some ice and put it in a bag. She could have easily drawn an iratze but, she didn't think it will help with the pain.

I don't even know if I belong here.

I don't think I do.

But Jace is here

Izzy is here

Alec is here

They want me here.

I'm just to weak.

Addy walked back to her room, zoned out. She opened the door and closed it. She laid back down on her bed.

She knew that tomorrow was Izzy's trail. She prayed that her sister will be able to be free of charges.

But because of Lydia, Alec's fiancé, probably not. Addy didn't know why she arrest her.

Addy didn't know why Alec wanted to marry her.

But she knew one thing, the only thing Valentine has taught her that she actually used. But she failed that lesson. And it costed her dearly.

Lydia gets Alec.

Dammit.

I'm still in love with Alec, even with my protests. My heart aches because of this.

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