[S01E20] "What Happens in Vegas"

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Rick was the first to wake up. He would have been happy to keep sleeping, but his bladder had different ideas about the situation.

He gently slid his arm out from under Liz's head. His body felt like it was made out of lead bricks as he made his way to the cold sterile bathroom. His mouth was a dry as his bladder was full. No sooner had he emptied his bladder before using his hand to bring gulps of water from the sink's faucet to his mouth. That was when he noticed that he had a stink on him strong enough to make him not want to be in the room with himself. He started up the shower and spent the next few minutes continuing his drunken nap standing under the shower head.

Rick's absence did not go unnoticed by Liz. Without Rick there the bed felt big, cold, and empty. She cracked her eyes open as best she could and peered around the room. Rick was nowhere to be found. Maybe he went outside for a smoke, she thought. Then she heard the flush of the toilet and instantly had to pee herself. As soon as he gets out of there, I'm going to do the same, she thought. But instead of the door opening and Rick stepping out, the shower went on instead. Now she was wide awake.

She bounced and rolled around in bed for as long as she could before she decided she couldn't wait any longer. It's not like we haven't seen each other naked before she thought. She got up and grabber the door handle. It was locked. She banged on the door.

"Rick!" She yelled through the white painted particle board door. "You okay in there?"

To Rick the pounding on the door sounded like cannon fire, waking him from his standing sleep.

"Yeah," Rick responded, "I'll be out in a minute."

"Rick, I have to pee and the door is locked!"

Rick really didn't want to get out from under the hot water. For a moment, he debated letting her pee herself. But then he thought about how he would feel if he was on the other side of the door. He shut the water off and slowly made his way out of the shower and to a towel. Liz continued to pound on the door.

"Rick! I really need to take a piss! I'm not joking around out here!"

Rick opened the door and Liz nearly knocked him over on the wet floor.

"Jesus, Liz. Are you trying to kill me?"

"Will you get the fuck out so I can pee already?"

"Sure, whatever."

Rick slammed the door behind him.

When Liz was done relieving herself, she was still a bit mad at Rick for slamming the door on her, so she took a shower. It calmed her down a bit, but she still had a piece of her mind to give to Rick. She was ready to give it to him too, but when she opened the door she found Rick was gone and housekeeping was changing the sheets. The maid let out a yelp.

"I'm so sorry," said the maid, "I didn't know anyone was in here. There was no sign on the handle."

"Don't worry about it," said Liz, "I was just leaving."

Liz made her way down to the lobby. She scanned the floor and didn't see Rick anywhere. She went to the service counter.

"Have you seen where my friend went?"

"Yes, Ms. Sheffield, you're all checked out already. Your gentleman friend said he'd be out at the car."

When she got out to the parking lot, she found Rick sprawled across the trunk of the car with one arm over his eyes and another feeding him a cigarette on regular intervals.

"So, you checked us out already?" asked Liz.

"No, I tried to get us another night but the room was already rented. Seems that they're all booked up for NASCAR." Rick said without looking up.

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