Chapter 24

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I opened my eyes to see a medical clinic. Frowning I looked down at Cody "Ummm Cody..... Why are we here?" I watched him not understanding his nervous attitude.

"Because I remembered that you use to volunteer at the hospital in your old pack and you seemed to love it... And I thought this might give you a sense of belonging to our pack." He smiled nervously. I smiled and kissed his cheek.

"That's so sweet." I grinned looking at the clinic. I felt him shuffling from foot to foot and moved to look at him. "What is it?"

"I also thought you could get a check up from Clarissa while we are here...." He trailed off looking at his feet. I moved off of his back and faced him arms crossed carefully guarding my feelings from him. "Please Juls." He pleaded.

I sighed remembering we were trying not to fight and turned towards the doors of the clinic trying to muster some type of courage. For years I have known I was infertile I went through a lot because of that. Part of me doesn't want to know and I turned around to tell him just that but one look at his hopeful face and I felt my resolve crumble. Instead I held my hand out to him and let him happily lead me to what I felt will be my doom. We walked up to the reception desk but I didn't pay any attention to consumed with my own negative thoughts.

'What if she tells him what I've already known and he tells me to leave again?' A nagging thought invaded my head. I shook my head no he wouldn't do that not again we are mates. 'And you weren't before?' I felt him pull me into his lap and stroke my hair trying to reassure me. 

"It'll be alright, Juls." He whispered.  As if reading my own crazy argument with myself. 

But of course my subconscious had more to say. 'What if you rejected him for no reason?' I stiffened at the thought. The pain, the running, and all the waiting could I have done it all for nothing? I went to get up to run, but I felt his arm tighten around me. Do I want to know the answer to these questions? No, I decided. No matter the answer wouldn't it just hurt us more? 

I continued this inner battle for some time before I heard my name being called "Julia Bernard, Julia Bernard!" A short overweight lady called out impatiently. Cody pulled us up and towards the woman never letting go of me. The woman looked back and forth between us before settling on me. "Are you ok, Mame?" Everything in me was telling me to run.

"Julia?" He questioned worriedly. 

"I....I..." I started before my eyes connected with his deep green eyes. I knew I had to do this for him. I took a deep breathe and nodded knowing if I spoke I'd break down. Being satisfied she lead us down the hall. Please let this work out I prayed. She took my blood pressure and weighed me. She tried to engage me but I ignored her and focused on Cody. 

"Doctor Martez will be with you shortly." She said walking out of the room scribbling on her notepad. Cody stood up and took my hand. 

"Julia what's going on in your head? This is the first time you've locked me out since we bonded it's scaring me." He whispered softly pulling me to him. How could I tell him how scared I was? How big of a coward I am? I didn't want the answer anymore and I could feel his hope. I know even if I tried to explain he wouldn't understand so I didn't try. 

"Tell me more about what happens if I join your pack." I said trying to avoid the topic

" Well you'd be Luna...." He frowned not quite sure as to what I was asking.

"Yea but what would be expected of me? How will I fit in with the pack?" I asked steering to other concerns of mine.  He frowned now he was blocking me out. "Cody our Luna died before I was born."

He gave a sheepish smile in understanding. "Well normally Lunas take care of the emotional well fare of the pack and support their Alpha."

"So like a counselor?" I questioned trying to understand.

"In part.... some tend to work in hospitals or as teachers as well. Basically the Luna is the packs mother. Does that make sense?" He explained. I nodded. "Good. As for how you'll fit in that's more up to how you want to fit in. What kind of person do you want to be to the pack?" We went into silence for a moment letting me mole over these new thoughts. "So does this mean your considering it?" He grinned.

I smirked back at him. "Are you considering letting Lucas in?" He growled in response making me chuckle. "That's what I thought." 

"Fine." He grumbled. " I'll consider it if he can prove he can protect you and prove he's trust worthy." I was so happy I was about to jump him when the doctor came in. 

"Alpha." She greeted Cody with a bow with a fist over her heart. She gave me a small smile. " Nice to see our future Luna happy and back safely. Now I have gone over your files and I think there may have been an error. " She gave me an encouraging smile at my panicked look. " I don't want you to worry and I don't want to get you hopes up, but we need to run another test before we can go over options."  Too late I thought. I could feel my worry building up and I didn't need the bond to see how hopeful Cody was right now. 

"Can you tell us what the error is?" He asked her, but her eyes were trained on me. 

"Alpha can you leave the room?" She asked not looking at him. He opened his mouth to object, but she silenced him. "I'm sure you wouldn't like seeing me draw blood from her and I do like my hospital rooms, so please go wait outside." He took a sharp breathe and left. The moment the door closed I let out a sharp breathe I hadn't realized I was holding. She rolled up a chair and grasped my shaking hands. "Do you want children?" she asked.

I just stared at her trying to find my voice. "Ye...Yes." I stuttered.

"Then what is the matter?" She spoke softly but something in her voice told me not to bullshit her.

"It's just I've known this for so long... I went through a lot ....." I drew a breathe and she squeezed my hands.

"I understand." She soothed. "Let me tell you what I know." I nodded for her to continue. "You were young when you went to the doctor chances are you went by yourself?" I nodded. " He wasn't a pack doctor who dealt with werewolf woman. So when you had gone to him and he saw you oversized ovaries he freaked out?" I nodded. "Well that's a common thing for females of our kind so that's the first error. This is why we push for werewolves to see our own kind."

"But the test...." I argued. 

"Was correct you are infertile; however the diagnosis he gave you he never should of. PCOS isn't a one test syndrome you have to take multiple and even then it's not a guarantee you have it. I think you probably have a more easily treated diagnosis I am just not positive until we take these tests. Now whatever you went through I can not change, but I can tell you it is not your fault you were given a bad diagnosis from an incompetent doctor. So are you ready to find out exactly what's wrong with you?" 

"I am." I spoke feeling more confident then I have all day.


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