Coldplay's new album is just so perfect I suggest everyone listen :P

Coldplay - Magic

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I darted my eyes between the bottle of water in my fridge and the half empty bottle of rosé. Deciding not to be stupid, I grabbed the bottle of water and leaned against my counter downing half of it in a few gulps. It was almost half two in the morning. After I got home earlier, I'd passed out on my couch from exhaustion and woke up two hours before I was due to meet Alisha. Dinner with her was lovely, we had Thai food and we had our last catch up before she goes back home tomorrow morning. She'd be back in Manhattan before New Years and agreed to help me with ideas for a series I had yet to come up with.

And after I got home around eleven, already feeling a little confident from the glass of white wine with dinner I'd text Eddie like the weakling I was. Sue me. He was barely through the door before I'd dragged him by the collar to my bedroom and had my wicked way with him.

"Can I say hello?" He said a smile twitching at his lips as I started on the belt of his jeans.

I raised a brow as I flicked the button open and lowered the zip. "I'm not stopping you."

Eddie didn't say anything at first, especially when I yanked his coat off, pulled his t-shirt over his head and hooked my fingers into his belt hoops.

"Hello," He finally said but his voice had dropped an entire octave when my dressing gown dropped open a little. Of course, I'd had my shower before he'd arrived so I was wearing nothing underneath.

I smiled, gripped onto both his jeans and boxers and yanked them down, dropping to my knees in the process.

I darted my eyes from his lowered gaze to his well endowed friend between his legs and replied, "And hello to you too."

But now, waking up realising that we hadn't specified whether he'd stay or not I'd glanced at his head resting on my stomach - he's such a mover in his sleep - and walked straight into the kitchen to rehydrate.

When I was standing at the fridge, I also realised this is the first time I've had a moment to actually think about what I was doing. I had no time this morning from waking up late for breakfast at The Plaza, to going out to dinner this evening and shamelessly thinking about nothing other than Eddie's mouth performing unholy actions. And now here I was, standing in my kitchen wearing his discarded old t-shirt rethinking the half bottle of wine.

I held the cold bottle to the heated skin on my forehead and sighed. We'd done everything but really talk talk and that was mainly what we needed to do regarding what the hell we were doing. I knew bits and pieces about him but I needed just that bit more maybe for my own sense of reassurance. I say reassurance but I think I just want to know about Debbie.

What was I doing? Eddie was a father. I was working with his ex-wife. Plus we worked together for crying out loud. Was this fair on his daughter; he said it himself he didn't just introduce anyone to her not that that would be much of a problem because I'd already met her. Plus we're not in any sense of a relationship.

And what if this didn't work out? What if this ends badly? What if... What if...

I closed my eyes with yet another sigh. Over-thinking. As I do best. The worst thing about this was I didn't want to just stop. It'd only just began and I still felt like I wanted more of him.

A time limit. That's what I needed. I needed a good amount of time to have a substantial fill of him. Not so long where I'd start to do something stupid like develop feelings other than the physical kind or worse fall for him. I'd be a fool.

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