twenty one

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"derek you can't keep doing this?!" i yelled at him

it's been 2 months since this whole freshlee thing happend, it's starting to get bigger and known but it's beginning to annoy me now. he's been coming back home at stupid times. he's either high or wasted. i just can't take it no more.

there was even rumours that he's cheating again but, i'm not even going to start with that.

"what so, you just want me to stop hanging with them right, is that so?"

"no derek! i'm not saying that, it's just that you're changing a lot and it's beginning to pressure me."

"how is that my fault that i'm becoming a different person?" he said with irritated tone

"i never even said it was your fault. i'm just saying calm down with what you're doing. it's not healthy."
(pm asf)

he rolled his in annoyance and face palmed himself.

"i'm fucking tired of this." he mumbled in his hand

"fucking tired of what?" i mocked shrugging my shoulders

"you! you act as if i'm some child! i'm a grown man."

that hurt.

"it's like you don't wanna see me happy. like you want me to fail just so you can have me to yourself."

"me?!" i said pointing to myself

"i want to see you fail. i bring into my house because you was suffering in your own. i forgiven you when you've done me wrong. i helped you when you needed funds and you're telling me that i want to see you fail!" i exclaimed with tears starting to come out my eyes

he went silent very quickly.

"so me trying to make you happy is also trying to make you fail." i said with tears rolling all the way down my face

"what a world we live in." i shrugged

he sighed in stress and walked over to the couch and leaned against it. he looked down at his shoes and started shaking his head.

"what?" i questioned

"i can't do this." he said

"what do you mean, you can't do this?"

he completely ignored me and went upstairs. i couldn't be bothered to argue with him again. i didn't follow him. i just went into the kitchen and sat on the kitchen stool

after a couple minutes. i saw him come back downstairs with two duffel bags.

what the fuck is he doing?

i rushed over to him walking in front of him.

"derek stop, what are you doing?"

"i can't keep arguing with you like this. this is like the 5th time this month."

"all because of my music." he added "no but that doesn't you have to go." i said trying to stop him

"i just feel like your vibe and energy is not what i want to be around. i just feel like you're not happy for me." he said calmly

"so what are you saying?"

"kamiya, we need a break." he sighed

"i'll just go back to my moms. believe it or not, christmas morning. i went to go visit her. she told me she's changed and she's really sorry for everything she's done. but me being so whipped over you, i just didn't listen to her."

"but i need to give my mom a chance and see. delaney and denzel are coming back with me as well." he explained

my heart shattered.

'we need a break'

that's basically 'we're breaking up'

i just left it. if that what he makes him happy then so be it.

i nodded my head and looked down at my sliders. my eyes were starting to become glossy.

i walked off to the kitchen and sat on the kitchen stool

"bye kam" he said leaving the door

i just ignored him and laid my head flat on the kitchen counter.

••••

this chapter was short asf but hella heartbreaking. i enjoyed writing it thoughhhh.

next chapter is gonna be more straight to the point though.

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