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"I'm in love with Mark." I cringed as I said it out loud. Emily's face went from expectation, to shock, to absolute glee. Quite frankly it scared the hell out of me.

"Oh my God! Why didn't you TELL me?" She shrieked so loud I thought my eardrums might be ruptured and I knew the neighbours probably heard her. I shushed her and let her do this really weird dancing-hugging thing with me. I cleared my throat and she broke away and dusted us both off. "Sorry."

"It's fine. I didn't need my hearing anyways." I said drolly. She snorted and pulled me back down to sit on my bed. I sighed and thanked the powers that be he wasn't there to hear the commotion.

"So, details! Gimmie details now. How long? Have you made a move? Have you seen him naked!?" She whisper-shouted at the end and I looked at her like she was crazy.

"Starting from the last question, no, sort of, and are you kidding? Since the beginning. He is gorgeous." I admitted with a blush. She laughed and then stopped short. Her eyes narrowed on me and she raised a finger to point at me.

"Wait, what do you mean by 'sort of'?" She raised a brow and stared me down. I giggled and leaned in close.

"I kissed him on my birthday, and I may or may not have been flirting with him a bit since." I acknowledged. She awed at me and patted my head like a dog. That just made me want to glare at her.

"Sweetie, that is cute and all, but he is a grown man. You are going to have to step up your game if you want to land the big fish. I suggest prancing around in a towel after your showers." She grinned at my look of horror. I started shaking my head violently.

"No. No way. Uh uh. Not happening. Come on Emily. I have morals." I protested. She just laughed deviously.

"That's okay. We can fix that. I have some books you should read. You will probably be uke, sorry but that is just the way things are..." She babbled on. Now I was confused. Did she think I was gross?

"What the hell are you talking about? Do I smell bad or something?" I checked but she just shook her head at me.

"Relax, young padawan. There is much to learn." Then she proceeded to give me the worst sex talk of my life. I didn't understand most of it. Something about baseball and Japanese cats.

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