Beautifully Damaged

21. Angel

I blinked, drawing in a deep breath, “Are you kidding?”

Alex didn’t look like he was messing with me; actually, his ever-serious eyes were colder than ever.

A strangled laugh parted my lips, and I covered them with my hands, trying to keep my disbelieving thoughts to myself. “Actually, I’d prefer it if you were joking right now,” I blurted out.

The world just loved throwing me curveballs that I couldn’t catch. It skewed my sense of actuality, and made me question my sanity and life. The more rational voice in my head told me that, of course he was joking, but the babbling of my panic-stricken conscience drowned it out.

Alex raised an eyebrow at me, his face frozen in its stoic form. “You told me to give you an answer, and you interrupt me because you don’t believe me?”

I threw my hands up in the air, sure that my expression was bewildered. “Can you blame me?” Taking a second to lower my voice, I brushed the hair out of my eyes. “Am I just supposed to believe that- that-?” I gestured to him, unable to utter the words.

“I’m your guardian angel?” He finished, so calm that I hated him for it.

“Yes!” I sputtered, ignoring the fact that this had spun way out of my control so easily. Finally, logic drowned out pointless babble in my head and I shook my head, sobered. “You know, it’s just like you to give me an answer like that.”

Alex rolled his eyes, “You see? That’s why I didn’t tell you, I knew you’d act like this.”

I laughed, tilting my head back and closing my eyes. “And you knew that because you’re my guardian angel?” I mocked, rejecting the idea completely, “Would it kill you to give me a straight answer for once?”

“Apparently not because I just did!”

I crossed my arms across my chest, “I don’t believe you.”

He groaned, running his hands through his golden hair. “You’re impossible!”

“That coming from you?”

“If you would just listen to me for once, instead of writing me off like-”

“Like you’re some insufferable jerk that likes to see me struggle with everything?” Stubbornly, we both stared at each other, jaws set, eyes narrowed. “Prove it,” I challenged, unsure of where that came from.

His face changed, melting into a grimace of sorts. “You see, that’s the problem, I can’t.”

I let the words sink into the air around us, letting the absolutely ludicrous situation drag on. “Yeah, I don’t know how I’m supposed to just take your word on it,” I said finally.

Of course it wasn't true. Alex was being himself, just trying to mess with me, as he always did. After all, a real guardian angel wouldn't disclose that information so freely, right? Or would they? I groaned, a hand on my forehead as a dull throbbing started up in it. It was the fuzzy type of headache that Bear often worried me about, but he wasn't here now.

Then, his serious façade melted away, stripped from his face just as quickly as it had been painted. Alex laughed.

Disbelieving, my mouth dropped open. He had been playing with me? Thoroughly ruffled, I stared at him, dismissing the fact that I should be embarrassed and annoyed. Above all of the emotions I seemed to feel all the time, there was the tiniest doubt in my mind.

Had his laugh been forced? Too tight to be natural? Or had I just imagined it?

"I can't believe you actually believed me," He smirked, turning back to his car and breaking our eye contact.