Deb was a real idiot about me turning her down. Emily dumped her ass during lunch, saying if she couldn't stop going on about it that she had to stop hanging out with us because she wasn't just making me uncomfortable. I was very grateful for the support, even if I felt a little bad that her friends were deserting her for my sake.
That gave the senior courage to ask me out though. His name was Justin. He played tennis and volleyball. He was tall, dark and handsome, or so Emily kept saying. As much as I liked his thick black hair and deep chestnut eyes, I was beginning to believe that I was a lot more like my mother than I thought. I had a thing for blondes.
Emily said I should give it a shot with him though. He seemed nice and it was very flattering to be asked by an older boy. He was also apparently well known by my mother, because when I told her that I had been asked out she was very excited. It was strange to me to realise that it didn't matter so much if I was gay, just that I dated the right boy for her.
"Good for you sweetie! Justin Knightly. He is such a catch. I swear if I was twenty years younger I would totally go for him." She gushed as Mark and I sat there uncomfortably. As if. You know you'd fuck him now if you had a chance, I thought to myself churlishly.
"I didn't say yes, mum. I asked him to think about it." I muttered. Her excitement was kind of putting a damper on mine. Mark was completely quiet, just watching her with a strange detached look.
"Well you are going to, right? I mean, he is a Knightly and absolutely gorgeous, am I right? You two should go on a date for Valentines Day. Wouldn't that be so romantic? Awe, my baby is growing up into such a little stud." She finally stopped talking when the food showed up, but by then I wasn't hungry. I had this weird tight feeling in my chest that made it hard to swallow anything.
Mark and I kept exchanging glances that I wasn't sure I could interpret. He didn't seem to want to speak up, and neither of us really knew what to say at the time. Everything my mother said from then on to me involved telling me I was going to date this boy, it seemed whether I liked it or not. I liked the idea less and less. It wasn't Justin's fault, but I couldn't help the fact.
That is what made it very hard to face him at school the next day. It would seem that my mother had already spoken to his parents. He was excited because he was under the impression that I was going to say yes. That of course made it pretty much impossible to say no. My friends were terribly impressed that I was dating a senior.
Deb finally fell silent and rejoined the group. I am not sure why me dating Justin changed things for her, but she seemed apologetic about her outburst and everyone forgave her. Now they were all hyped up about me being walked to class, having him stop to talk to me on the way by with his friends, and the awkward hugs and cheek kisses.
So far he seemed content with just that. It was a relief honestly, because I was not ready to kiss him on the mouth and I hated the idea of PDA. I think he could tell that I wasn't a hundred percent on board with our relationship. He went out of his way to try and make me feel comfortable though, and I appreciated it.
Valentines day came far too quickly for me. My mother had arranged for reservations at a ridiculously expensive restaurant for two teenagers to be going on a date to. She sent our driver to pick up my boyfriend and insisted on taking pictures in the front hall when he arrived. He really did look great in his suit. So did I.
I didn't know what to do with the flowers he brought me, so I gave them to William to deal with. My mother was flirting with my date, and I glanced into the picture in the front hall to make sure my tie looked okay. Mark came over and gave it a few tugs, making my heart beat unreasonably out of my chest and fixing the tie perfectly again.
YOU ARE READING
My mother never could keep to one man. It wasn't like I went out of my way to fall in love. She was just blind, and he was just... perfect. It was impossible not to fall in love with my stepfather. The real question was... Did he love me?