1. Broken

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 I watch eagerly as the 2017 MAMA Awards prepare to anounce "Artist of the Year." My heart pounds in my chest as I stare at the TV screen and practically my whole body vibrates with tension. I have supported and voted for Bangtan Sonyeondan, or Bangtan Boys, the past weeks with all my might. 

Just then, my phone rings. I quickly turn it off without glancing at it, as all my attention is fixated upon TV. The time has come for the official anouncement. I can feel myself leaning forward as the two MC begins to talk. 

I live in Seoul, right where BTS lives, but I have never seen them outside the television or my phone screen. My parents have told me over and over it's unhealthy to obsess over "men too old for me." Sometimes I feel like I am an international fan who can never meet BTS.

Besides, the Bangtan Boys aren't that much older. Why, the youngest- the maknae- of the group, Jeon Jungkook is only three years older than me.

Once again, my phone buzzes and I instantly zip it again, a tiny bit of irritation sprouting in me. Why can't this call just wait? The female MC has opened the card that anounces the winner. I hold my breath and my whole body teeters on the edge of the couch as I strain my ears though I can clearly here the noise coming from the speakers.


I let out a breath and a grin spreads across my face, giving the Chester cat's smile from Alice in Wonderland some competition. My phone begins buzzing for the third time and I finally  look down in annoyance, the grin erased from my face in an instant. I want to hear the acceptance speech, but I can't concentrate if this person is always calling.

The caller ID declares it's Park Yun-ji, my best friend.

Yun-ji and I have been friends since five. Twelve years later, our friendship has remained strong, though lately, I feel like Yun-ji has been judging me a bit more on my love for BTS. She says I'm obssessing too much over them. She's probably right, but at least I've tried to get her into the fandom and when that didn't work, I've tried not to be all in her face about Kpop and everything.

"Hey Yun-ji," I say, finally answering the phone.


I wince and pull the phone a little away from my ear as she basically screams my full name into the reciever on the other end.

"I've been calling you over and over, why haven't you picked up?" she demands.

"Uh..." I'm a little lost for words, not knowing how to tell her my excuse in a way that it sounds good.

But she quickly catches on. "BTS again, huh?" Her voice is much more irritated than usual, sparking irritation in me. Why did she have to be so judgmental?

"Okay, what do you want, Yun-ji?" I ask wearily. I have to mute the TV so I'm not more distracted as RM begins the speech. Augh, I wanted to see all this live! All of it. Not rewatch it on youtube.

"It's my parents," Yun-ji replies, softer. More subdued. "They're at it again. I was wondering if I could come over to your house and spend the night. Now."

I bite my lip. Yun-ji's parents has a rocky relationship, which is one reason why Yun-ji and I had grown so close. Yun-ji would often come over my house since her house is about only a ten-minute walk away from mine to escape her parents' screaming. I know my parents won't mind, and it would definitely help Yun-ji out a lot. It's just her judgmental tone has rubbed me the wrong way. She's supposed to be my best friend and be the one to accept me no matter what. Not be one of the friends who don't like Kpop.

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