Her Beef 3: Love & War

Chapter 2

Desire

I know what she is trying to do. She is trying to doubt in my head and make me go against my family and I won't let her do it.

"So if this beef that you have has nothing to do with me and my brother than why are you coming at us? Why find Lexi to turn her against us?" I asked her with a stone face.

I may not be all heavy in the streets like my brothers and Shakeya, but I damn sure not naive either.

"Lexi made the choice to hate you and Shad. I never tried to make her hate neither one of y'all I wanted her to hate Chico. She envied the life that she saw you and Shad living that's what fueled her hate towards y'all." she said.

I couldn't tell if she was bullshiting or not. Something told me that she wasn't.

"Desire despite what you or your brother may think I would never hurt either of you guys. At one point in time you and Shad loved me. I was your favorite auntie." she said.

I have no memory of her in my life. My mother only always spoke of her brother. She never mentioned a sister. What happened between her and my mother?

"Desire your phone." she said snapping me out of my thoughts.

I had two missed calls from my father. I also had one text message.

From Chico: Des tell me the truth is Charlene there with you

I didn't have to guess or think about it I just answered him.

To Chico: Yes

He never responded back to me. I just put my phone down and Charlene was starting a hole into me.

"If you are worried you shouldn't be. It was just Kelly saying she finally talked to Shad." I said to her not really knowing why.

Something in me said lie to her and something told me to tell my father the truth that Charlene was here.

"What happened between you and my mother?" I asked her.

She blew out air and looked to the ceiling. She smiled and than her smile turned to sadness. Tears filled her eyes and there was an emptiness I saw that I hadn't seen even when she was speaking about her husband.

It dawned on me that I had just hit a soft spot for her.

"Your mother and I once had a relationship just like yours and Shad's. If you saw one you saw the other. Then I met King and your mother hated him. She felt he was taking me from her. I never realized it than but he was tearing me away from her." she said pausing to wipe her tears.

I saw the heartbreak in her eyes. I felt the pain that was present on her face.

"Eva would ask me to hang out with her and King would say that I couldn't go. If I would try to leave he would beat me. I would have to wear sunglasses cause I had a black eye. Eva got tired of me not showing up or avoiding her so she just stopped trying." she said.

"Then she met Carlos aka Chico and fell in love. She didn't know that Chico was out in the streets hustling until she had Shad. She did everything to convince him to get out the street. When Shad was two your mother reached out to me and I came." she said with tears streaming down her face.

I saw for the first time a broken woman. She was just as hurt and broken as I was. She had pain and she had feelings and emotions that she was showing me right now.

"Eva was my sister and she needed me so I was there. I listened to her talk about how she didn't understand why Chico chose the streets over his family. She didn't even know that I had the same feelings. King loved the streets but I never told her that. She told me about Lexi. She named her after our baby sister Alexis that had passed away when she was three." she said.

I never knew anything about that. I wanted my aunt in my life just so that she could tell me the things about my mother I never understood.

"Eva was crushed that she couldn't keep Lexi. She was only seventeen when she got pregnant with her. When she found out that she was pregnant with you I was right by her side. By that time your father was damn near a drug lord and Eva was tried of it. When she made up her mind she didn't want you or your brother around the drug life that cut me out too." she said.

I didn't realize I was crying too til a tear hit my arm.

" I was caught up in the game with King. One day your mom said to me to choose. I had to pick her and my kids or King. I made a choice that ever since the day your mother died I wish I never made. I chose King so she said I couldn't be part of her or her children's lives. Was I wrong for picking King? At the time I didn't think so. I thought I was post to pick the one who was taking care of me hell the father of my children." she said drying tears.

"When your mother found out she was dying she reached out to me again. She asked me to find Lexi. I found her and I took my sister to see her. Then she gave me this to give to you." she said handing me a letter.

"Don't worry I never opened it. She said give this letter to my baby girl when the time is right." she said.

I looked at that envelope with my mom's writing on it like someone had just giving me a bomb. I didn't know what it said. I don't know if I was ready to hear what she had to tell me.

Dear Desire

I know you couldn't stand me as you got older, but there are just something's that you were to young to understand.

That doesn't take away from the fact that I love you with all my heart. I am sorry if you felt I was rough on you and I never let you have your way, but it was because I wanted to protect you.

You and Shad have a sister that is older than both of you. Her name is Lexi. Please learn to love her the way you and your brother love each other. It is not her fault she was not there with you guys.

As for your Aunt Charlene be careful when it comes to her baby girl cause she is sneaky and money hungry. She will only tell you part of the truth.

The real reason why her and I became so distant was because once your father got bigger than King in the streets she wanted him.

Its all about money with her regardless of what she tells you.

Now your father loves you with all his heart. He tried to be there for you and your brother but I wouldn't let him be. I thought I was protecting you.

No matter what I love you baby. And if you are reading this I lost my battle wit cancer.

Baby you are so strong AMD beautiful. Make sure you look out for your brother cause you know he shuts down when things get crazy.

My children have always been my greatest accomplishment. I love you beyond the grave.

Love you,
Mommy

I just cried like a baby. When I looked up and my aunt she was crying too but she had a gun pointed at me.

"I know your mother better than anyone. I really didn't read your letter but I know she warned you about me." she said.

I was so lost and confused. How did she go from saying she wouldn't hurt me to pointing a gun at me.

I saw someone dash past the door. It was Jewel. The my dad came walking in with his gun pointed at the back of my aunt Charlene's head.

"I knew you would figure it out Chico. I know Desire is your pride and joy. I knew you would come to save her." Charlene said.

All this was a plot to lure my father here, but for what reason. All of a sudden I thought about my kids and my nieces and nephews.

If I had to give my life tonight to save theirs I would because just like my dad is here to protect me I will do the same cause I am a parent now too.

"Don't do anything dumb Char. Name the price and its yours." my dad said.

Her face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Chico now you talking." she said.

I looked a her like well how much is my life worth to her.