Stop Hiding It (Raph x Reader)

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(This is a more feels chapter. I wanted to start with this because trust me I read and type a lot of these so I've gotten pretty good at it. Also Raph isn't one to be understanding so it adds to the conflict of it all. Also there are slight depression triggers in this. Just had to put a warning incase. Also this entire book is gonna take place in the earlier seasons unless I actually say otherwise on a certain chapter. Anyway enough of my voice! READ ON MY LOVELY PEOPLES! Edit: Hello everyone! I want to add this for all yals that are still coming in! In the chapter 'Dive Right In' (Raph x Hybrid!Reader) there is information at the bottom of the chapter for a cover art contest! Go check it out if you're interested!)

Your POV

You were in your room by yourself. You were feeling it all again. Your grief, your hate, your agony, everything. Your mother had died only a year ago. Today was a month before she'd died of some illness you didn't care to remember by name. But there was cause to celebrate as well. Today was the one year anniversary of you meeting your four closest friends, the turtles. 

Splinter was like a father to you, but he didn't quite make the cut. Your father had left your family when you were 3 so it was easy to see him like that. You often trained with the four brothers and Splinter. Splinter enjoyed teaching you, because you had known a lot about it when you first met them. Ever since one time when one of your old friends had saved you from a beating by local jerks you'd trained in combat skills. This was just a new form of combat skills. You already had the body build and strength for it, you just had to learn the moves. You were pretty good at all of it, so Splinter enjoyed sparing with you. What he'd do is spar with you and then just when you thought you'd won, he'd pull a new move on you. Then he'd teach you how to do it. It was fun, but that was the last thing you cared about today. 

You didn't care about anything today. You'd always struggled with your mother's death and living with your Aunt wasn't always the best. She didn't have a good job so supporting you and herself was sometimes a struggle. She was working until 7:00 a.m. today so you decided to try and make yourself feel better. You left and went to where you were always greeted with smiles, the Lair. Today they'd all be extra happy to see you. You knew that for a fact. The four brothers were very fond of you. 

Leo loved talking about Space Hero's with you. You didn't really like it, but the agreement was that if you listened to him then he'd listen to you about shows or other stuff that you like. It was pretty interesting on both sides actually. You both had bonded over it immensely. 

Mikey was wild and you loved having fun with him. You skateboarded with him, talked with him, and, of course, you always cooked with him. It was more you teaching him rather than cooking together. You made it so he didn't notice you were trying to teach him though. You both loved listening to music and Mikey, when you got to see him dance, wasn't half bad at dancing. He was all around a fun guy and loved to have fun. 

Time with Donnie was always interesting. You were good at what he was good at, that being science and robotics and such. You two got along very well. Donnie loved spending time with you because you were the one he could talk to about his techno stuff and not get eye rolls and confused looks. You often helped Donnie with his machines and sometimes his mixtures and such. Donnie didn't really trust anyone with his chemicals and mixtures, so it was a bit more of the machine stuff. 

Raph was your favorite. He was rude and had some temper issues at times, but when you were around he always seemed to be in a good mood. Sometimes you came when he was in a bad mood and he snapped at you, but it was never too harsh. You didn't know if Raph loved hanging out with you, but he seemed to enjoy it at least. You both would often talk and you'd listen to him if he was upset or angry. He even told you some things he didn't feel comfortable sharing with anyone else. You didn't know why he told you. Probably just to get it out without being laughed at or teased or something like that. You were a pretty understanding person after all. 

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