Chapter 38

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That Sunday didn't turn out any different from how we usually acted at home. We never showed any romance when we were around our family anyway, so it wasn't like we had to act differently than normal. However, before, we had stolen glances at each other when we knew no one was watching, but that day we pretty much ignored each other like we were thin air. It hurt. It felt like there had never been something between us, and that was worse than knowing it had been something that had now ended.

Gemma was with Devon the entire day so I hadn't had time to talk to her about anything. Hell, I didn't even know whether she had seen the tweets or not. I wanted to hear her opinion, what she thought about it all. Not that it would change anything, but it was always better to talk to someone than keep things that hurt to yourself. On the other hand, I was aware that Louis didn't have anyone to talk to, but that couldn't be helped.

On Monday morning, I prepared myself for the day like I usually did before walking down to the kitchen. It was no surprise to see it was empty. Whenever Louis didn't want to see me, he always made sure that we weren't in the kitchen in the morning at the same time. So, without caring too much about it, I made myself breakfast and sat down at the table, looking out through the window as I ate it.

My brain had been all over the place the last couple of days. It wouldn't just focus on one thing but kept going through the last conversation Louis and I'd had and also every memory we had shared together.

Though, I hadn't cried since it happened. I'd wanted to more times than one, but it had never gotten further than my eyes getting teary. I assumed that was because I felt so empty. Knowing the boy I loved would never be in my arms again made me feel so lost and helpless. It hurt so bad that I couldn't think straight. Like I said, I couldn't even focus on one thing at a time anymore. The worst part was that it had only been one day. I wondered how it would turn out in the long run.

To be honest, I was pretty happy that I didn't see his figure this morning because it would only hurt more to see him, knowing that you couldn't touch him or kiss him. You couldn't even tell him how much you felt for him because it didn't matter anymore. It was over.

With a heavy sigh, I brought the last spoonful of cereal to my mouth and swallowed it down. After that, I put the empty bowl in the sink before going upstairs to brush my teeth.

Five minutes later, I was standing in the hallway, tying my shoes. That was when I heard feet walking down the stairs. On instinct, my eyes instantly looked up to see who it was even though I should already know since there was only one person but me who was home and had their bedroom on the second floor.

My tongue got stuck in the throat when our gazes met. It was only briefly because the next second, Louis looked away from me. Though, the short time that our eyes were connected, something burst inside me and I was pretty sure it was my heart. My breathing got heavier by the second but calmed down slightly when he disappeared into the kitchen quickly.

Damn, what was I going to do with my life? Why did we have to live in the same fricking house? It was insanely unbearable.

A few seconds later, I found myself slamming the door shut behind me, and I started making my way towards the bus stop. I walked with my head down, not wanting to see or be seen by anyone. Once there, I was disappointed to see that the bus hadn't arrived yet. There were a few people already waiting for it, and I didn't want to be near anyone, so I stopped a few yards away, leaning against a lamp-post.

If it weren't for the fact that it was freezing cold outside, I would have fished my phone from my pocket, but since it was, I'd rather not get my hands out of my jeans pockets. Thankfully, it didn't take more than a minute until the bus finally showed up at the corner of the street.

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