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Pen Your Pride

[A Hesitant Story] ~1~

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"writing is learning to say nothing, more cleverly every day."

ChApTeR 1~

"I didn't want her dead!" My chair gave way with an angry screech beneath me as I stood to confront the officer standing in front of a long metal table, arms  

crossed at his barrel chest. "I - I never planned for it to go this far..." I said in a quieter tone. My voice quivered as if it was trying to mimic my heart.  

I prayed for tears to brim my eyes so that I could blur the image of this terrible man in front of me. How dare he? How dare he accuse me of killing my best  

friend? She was everything to me! Suddenly the tears did come, and they fogged my vision just as I'd hoped, but not for long. Fat ugly teardrops rolled down my dirt streaked face revealing the pale skin beneath, and my vision was cleared again. I stared at him, and a rush of  

violent hatred pooled in my heart. His face was so sure. His lips were pursed and his eyes stared me down in a way that I knew exactly what he was thinking.  

He doesn't believe me.  

"No one said she was dead Margret. The blow to her head was pretty fatal, but the doctors haven't called time of death yet." His deep monotonous voice  

echoed and rattled in my eardrums. To my surprise, a hearty laugh erupted from my perfectly glossed lips.  

I didn't know why I was laughing at first but then it occurred to me: Of course she isn't dead!...not yet. The officer furrowed his brow, and pursed his lips so  

hard that I thought his mouth would shrivel up and disappear. My legs began to wobble and I slowly lowered myself into the wooden chair beneath me.  

"Shes not dead? Really?" I asked. 

"No," was his simple answer. I could tell he was still confused at my reaction and a little disgusted but what did I care? He doesn't know me...not like  

Naomi knows me...knew me. 

"If shes not dead then why am I here? Do you know what? This is absolutely ridiculous! I'm not going to sit here and watch you try to convince me to  

confess a murder that I didn't commit! You guys seriously need to find yourself a new witness because if I'm the best that you can do then this is the craziest-" 

He grabbed my arm just as I was collecting my things and heading for the door. His eyes held a wild ferocity in them.  

"You are are absolutely right Miss Margret. This is crazy, a - a - and completely ridiculous. Its scary that a well respected member of our community can't  

walk down the street without fear of her life. Its crazy that the same well respected member actually had good reason to be afraid and its ridiculous that the  

moral fabric of our community is so deteriorated that when questioned for a serious crime, one can just dismiss the crime as a joke and exit the premises  

with no understanding of what has truly just happened. Miss Margret I understand that you may have more important things to do in your life than sit here and  

discuss your best friend's death but unlike you I don't. I don't have anything better to do but sit here and deliver justice, demand obedience, and save lives,  

and thats exactly what I'm going to do. I want you to understand this really really good Miss Margret," he released my arm and in the place of where his hand  

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