A Negative

Fifteen

Dear Diary,

 It’s been six months since I’ve received a diagnosis for von Willebrand disease. It’s not exactly as terrifying as it sounds but I’ve had to adjust to having it, that’s for sure. Mom gifted me with her beauty and her thin blood. We are like two pieces of the same puzzle, and Ryan just put us together into something that made sense. Mom has von Willebrand disease, too. That’s why her leg took so long to heal. Becky got off scott free, but her kids will need to be tested.

 I’ve been on the pill ever since and I’m proud to say that I am no longer a repeat customer on Day 28’s website and I don’t kick Ryan out of my life for half the month anymore. The pill isn’t a small miracle in itself, but combined with other products that I can take if I bleed, my life has turned around completely.

 I’ve since learned that Ryan’s mind is like a sponge. He absorbs absolutely anything he hears or reads and I couldn’t be more grateful because I could have gone most of my life, like my mom, without knowing. Ryan pegged von Willebrand disease from his first suspicion and he wouldn’t let anyone tell him any different. But here’s the thing: not everyone has a Ryan, and I know that some women will go years without a proper diagnosis.

 I’m more in love with the good Dr. Ryan Maxwell than is probably socially acceptable but I can’t help it. It’s a wonderful life.

 Signed,

Ashley

 

Ryan stands at the door of the barn leaning against the frame. “Are you sure you don’t want me to do it?”

“Nah,” I say. “Damon and I are zen.”

“You think so, huh?”

I grab his feed and swing the door to his stall open. “Yeah,” I say. “I know so.”

Ryan smiles. “You do, do you?”

“Sure I do.” I enter the stall and give Damon his food. He doesn’t make a move to eat it, instead, looking at me with respect and understanding in his eyes. I rub my hand along the length of his forehead down to his nose. “You know how I know, Ryan?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me, sweetheart.”

“Damon didn’t hate me. He was trying to change my life by making me realize something was wrong.”

I kiss Damon on the nose and leave, closing the door behind me.

Ryan approaches me and wraps his arms around my waist. “I think if we’re being technical, it was me who noticed something was wrong, so maybe you can stop kissing the horse and direct your kisses here.”

“You’re bragging,” I say.

Ryan smiles. “I’m just trying to impress a girl.”

“You are, are you?”

His lips brush across mine. “Is it working?”“

Yeah,” I tell him. “It really is.”