twenty nine // 113 lbs

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99 skinny | i can't breathe by grantgustens

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"Good morning!"

I jumped, looking up at the sudden bright, cheery voice coming from above me. Danielle stood beside me, her plate of breakfast Ashton had prepared for everyone in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other hand. She used her foot to pull the chair back and cutely plopped down, letting out a playful sigh.

"Hi..." I murmured, awkwardly glancing at the empty countertop in front of me. I had managed to skip breakfast again and this time only drank a bottle of water. I had also distanced myself from the boys, and sat at the island while everyone else sat at the kitchen table.

Ashton hadn't questioned me when I didn't request eggs or pancakes, instead waving me off and going back to Evie. As much as I didn't want this to bother me, it did. I wanted him to notice. I wanted him to worry. Blinking, I suddenly remembered Danielle was beside me and I prayed she wouldn't ask the absence of food in front of me.

"Where's your breakfast?" Danielle asked, frowning.

"I'm not hungry," I told her, yet my stomach growled in protest.

"Are you sure? Well, you can have some of mine if you get hungry..."

I shook my head. "I'm fine. Thank you, though."

"Can we go shopping?" Evie's voice whined from the table behind us, where everyone else was sitting.

"Sure, baby," Ashton leaned over, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

Calum expressed his discomfort with a loud groan, dramatically pretending to throw up as well. Like always, Luke and Michael laughed at his antics, watching him in amusement.

"Oh don't be a drama queen," Ashton huffed.

"Danielle, why don't you sit with us?" Evie suddenly spoke up.

The room went silent for a split second, and I was sure everyone – except for Ashton of course – had taken her comment the same way I had.

Danielle turned back around, casually saying over her shoulder, "Because Daisy is over here and I like Daisy."


"Okay everyone," Ashton said, bringing our group to the side. "Meet up in the food court in an hour?"

We all nodded, and now that we had established a plan, the group dispersed. Evie and Ashton went the opposite way, hands tightly clasped as they walked off. The rest of the group, Calum, Danielle, Michael, Luke and I, opted to all walk around together.


Calum and Danielle were loudly laughing, clutching each other as Calum filmed Luke trying on ridiculous sunglasses and goofily dancing along to the Justin Bieber song playing in the store. Michael was laughing also, but at the same time turning away from the scene in embarrassment.

"I'm going to the bathroom," I told Danielle, almost desperate to escape the embarrassment.

She nodded, still clutching her stomach in laughter. Staring down at the floor, I watched my legs as I walked, suddenly feeling self-conscious now that I was alone. Since Australia was hot, Ashton made me wear shorts and I couldn't feel less bad about myself at this point. Thinking of the way my fat legs jiggled as I walked by, and the numerous eyes staring me down, made me want to just disappear and curl into a ball. Trapped in my own little world, I walked out of the store, forgetting to look to make sure I didn't run into anyone.

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