Dating

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            When it comes to dating Muslims are not allowed to; Therefore, I have been taught to look down and stay away. I even wear the Hijab to symbolize this; however, it doesn't seem to stop men from I guess being men.  Meaning that they still try to hit on me even though I explain that I'm not allowed to date. It's flattering really,  considering that I don't think I'm even that pretty, the only thing I really have are my changing green eyes, seeing other girls my age look absolutely breath taking it amazes me. I get asked if I could date what would it look like?. Well growing up we would usually watch a lot of Indian movies; thus, that was what I learned love looked like and admired the way they captured the feeling. However, I grew up in the east side remember which is when I discovered the reality  of a thing called Fuck Boys. If you don't what they are by now consider your self lucky because they are everywhere  allow me to explain. They are boys who like tp take advantage of girls by pretending to be nice to them just so that they can have sex with them and dump them when they are done. I feel like that backfires on them because once the girl realizes that they can live and go on without them by remembering their worth is when the boy recognizes their mistake. Anyway, that would be why I'm glad I do not date because not only does  it eliminate stress but the cheating that comes with it. Now  I mean it would be nice to date for experience and who knows maybe not all guys are like that, if you find one let me know, but from what I have seen its very unlikely. Yes, I have trust issues bite me. This would also be why sometimes I don't put any effort into what I wear, because I don't give a fuck and other times I do my makeup and have nice outfits just to remind myself I can as well as to feel good for myself. Trust me ladies you don't a men to tell you how to do you because they ain't you. However it does feel good when they do I get it. One of the most memorable things  that happed between be and a guy, no I never had sex I'm a virgin so get that out your head, was when we were playing on the cold,  slippery monkey bars where he was going the opposite side of the them and he apparently was trying to see who was going to stay there the longest; naturally,  he decided to cheat by pulling on my pants which didn't bring me down. However, it did bring my pants down so I jumped off as fast as my legs would let me and pulled them back up. The feeling that went though my body can't even be explained. That was when I decided that hanging out with guys was not for me. Instead I focused more on sports and played soccer, which I was never really good at, when that was over I turned to track. I was good at running but never the best; however,  I did practice by taking advantage of the mile runs we were given and eventually ran a mile in six minutes.  What does this have to do with dating?. Well they definitely started to pay attention more because normally girls would complain about being active. From that I learned to be a bit sassy and tell them to fuck off. I said, " You barely know how to wipe your own ass what makes you think your ready for a relationship." it was a bit harsh but that was the point. Therefore, when guys are nice to me I never trust it or get flustered because I don't know what to do. There was a guy  who even sang to me in Spanish  and I vaguely knew what he said but I was thinking damn what the fuck do I even say. Well I didn't say anything because I knew it was not going to go anywhere; thus, I just enjoyed it while it lasted poor kid. I mean it would be nice to have someone but I feel like I would not even no where to begin.  Well there you have it my non-existing love life in a nutshell. 


Hope you liked it.  I suck I know  

-S 


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