Today we were escaping. Today, we were fucking escaping Wickendale Mental Institution for the Criminally Insane. This was it. I had longed for this day since arriving, and here it was. Of course I had strong faith that we would escape eventually, but now that the day was today and it seemed almost too good to be true.
And I was a nervous wreck. I didn't get nervous often, but now the cool, collected Harry was shaking in anticipation. Second thoughts and doubts were scraping their way through my mind with the sharp claws of fear. Excitement twisted in my stomach and anxiousness was released in sweat. Rose and I had gone over what was to be done in great detail, but that didn't mean there couldn't be a flaw or hole in our plan. That didn't mean that something could go wrong. And if something does go wrong and she gets hurt, I swear to God I'll -
I shook my head before that thought could grow any further. She won't get hurt because I won't let it happen. I will get us both out of here. But still, that pressure did nothing to ease my nerves. And neither did the fact that Rose would be the one to initiate the plan. Well, after Lori shut off the power, that is. Because she's the one with the key. She was the one that would be out of her cell first, roaming along the halls alone and vulnerable in the dark.
I stood up, needing to do something other than sit at the edge of the bed. I began to pace back and forth, running a hand through my hair. What if someone saw her before she even got to my cell? And I wouldn't be able to do anything about it?
Fuck, I needed to relax. If Lori would just do her job already so that we could move this along without too much thought, it would be much appreciated. But instead of the action starting right away, I was left with interminable minutes to go over our plan and possible complications again and again. Part one; Lori would shut off the power, Rose would unlock her cell and then release me from my own, I would deal with James, while Rose retrieved our bags. Then we would meet back up. My mind was too full of other thoughts to process the rest of our scheme for the time being. Thoughts like how Rose and I would finally be alone together. Thoughts like a guard or employee getting in the way of that. Thoughts like stabbing or beating my way through this place. Thoughts that gave apprehension to whether or not I should really be leaving a place that was supposed to help the insane.
And then the lights went off.
Saying that I was nervous would be an understatement. I was jittery, I was nauseous, and I couldn't seem to catch a breath. Don't screw this up, I said to myself again and again. It had been my goal for much too long now to get Harry out of here, and I had to succeed in that goal. Who knew what the consequences would be if I didn't.
The key in my pocket felt much too heavy, as if all of the dread and nerves I was feeling were instilled into its metal. My eyes kept flashing toward the lock on the outside of the bars that encaged me, ghosting the motions of unlocking it in preparation. I went over the route to Harry's cell in my head as if it were a skipping record, over and over to the point of annoyance. I could just imagine him there now, his anxiousness probably equalling to mine. I bet he had a cigarette between his lips, distressed lines etched into his brow. Maybe sitting and bouncing his knee anxiously, maybe pacing back and forth.
And this really wasn't a time to be thinking about such things, but I couldn't wait to get out of here so that we could finally be with each other in the way we wanted. If we were rid of this place, I could feel Harry's strong body, his smooth skin, his exhilarating lips, and his beautiful hands. Of course there were other reasons I wished to escape, too, but with all of the stress and fear of this place, I yearned for a way to forget.
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Psychotic (A Harry Styles Fanfiction)Fanfiction
"I loved her not for the way she danced with my angels, but for the way the sound of her name could silence my demons." - Christopher Poindexter