12th July 2018 Editing
2nd October 2017 All Rights Reserved.
It was the occasional voice calling my name that was slowly making me aware that I was waking up after the surgery. Then the god awful pain hit me as I felt as if my chest had been punctured and slapped with a two by four repeatedly over an extended period of time.
" Pain." I whispered in a groan painfully with my eyes still blackened since I couldn't open them. I couldn't help but groan a few more times as I tried to breathe through the pain I was now very conscious of.
A moment later I felt someone moving next to me as they were standing there beside me and a moment later, I was falling into oblivion again where I couldn't feel any pain at all. Thank goodness. That pain was awful was my last thought as I fell once more into the darkness where it welcomed me.
This happened on and off for some time that I couldn't count how long it has been since that first time. Everytime I woke up, I woke to feel that horrible pain clawing at me before someone would come close to me and I would fall once again into the darkness thta this forced sleep welcomed me to. I had realised that when someone came close, it was to inject me through the drip a lovely knock out concoction that i welcomed very muchly.
I don't know how long it was before other sounds, apart from the machinery around me, would filter into my hearing catching my attention. I think I could catch a word here and there and understand what they were saying. But then I couldn't.
But each time I would hear sounds, I would stay alert a little bit longer than the previous time. I still couldn't open my eyes yet or even move any of my hands.
I don't know when it was that I realised that there was an intubation tube running into my mouth and down into my oesophagus for oxygen which was pumped into my lungs assisting me to breath. At first I was feeling very disoriented when I felt it. But a soothing voice that was near and a slight hand on my right shoulder helped to sooth and calm me.
Which it did. Soothe me that is.
But I don't know for how long I would wake up a bit or how many times it happened. I just know that it felt like forever before the time came and I found that my eyes could finally move and open a little. And I meant only a little. I don't even know how much my eyes opened, but it only felt like they cracked open just a slit to allow bright lights to pierce under my eyelids.
I couldn't tell whether or not it was daylight or night time. I just know that the first time I woke up, the light that was around me was too bright for me to keep my eyes open, so I shut them rather quickly and sucuumbed to the darkness that was beginning to be my friend to hide the painful light and the agonizing pain that surrounded my left side each time I became aware of it.
Once, when I was alert enough to take stock of my self, I noticed that most of the pain was concentrated below my armpit. I could feel thick massive bandages wrapped around me and around and under my arm. I remembered that Dr Palmer said that if they suspect any other nodes being affected, they would take some extra tissue from the source. I guess he found some in my arm pit.
Hence the extra pain I was not expecting to feel. Hell, I didn't want to expect any pain to be honest. I'm not ashamed to admit I want pain killers. Bring on the morphine, or anything else that would take and numb the damn pain I was feeling more and more now that I was becoming more aware and alert.
But as usual, when I became aware of that horrible pain, there was always someone there to help take the pain away.
Once, when I became more alert than before, I thought I heard Gavin talking. I think he was mentioning something about Alyssa again. I don't like the girl and if he wants our mumma to be happy, he better not think about having a relationship with the little tart. When I wake up, I am going to tell him that too. Just he wait and see if I don't.
YOU ARE READING
A Hard Fall For HimChickLit
I made stupid choices. Choices that lead me to being a mother at a very young age. An age when I should have been spending time with friends worrying about the latest fashion or shopping at the mall. Years later, I met a man who made me want to th...