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"The wires got the best of him..."

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Pain makes the world go round.

It's what balances the world. Without pain, you would never know love. Without hurt, you would never know happiness. Pain is what makes you stronger and smarter. You can't live a life without knowing pain because you aren't really living. Pain is for the brave. You fall in love knowing that there's a possibility of breaking. You revel in your happiness because you know bad days will come.

You can't have a perfect life without knowing what beautiful pain feels like.

I've experienced so much in my life at such a young age, that I know you have to appreciate the good days. Because with me, you never know when a bad day is around the corner.

I've been working on looking for a place for the past week. Ever since Lip left, it's been easier to focus on leaving the Gallagher house. Fiona is hardly home, apparently she got married overnight to some guy she met the other day. His name is Gus and he's in a band. It came as a shock at first, but Fiona was never known to take things slow. I just hope that she doesn't realize that she made it mistake later rather than sooner. The kids are hardly home. Carl is suddenly speaking like a gangster and hanging out with the kids who hang out on the corner. Debbie has been hanging out with this boy Derek, who teaches her to fight after school. And Ian, Ian's with Mickey. Right where Mickey wants him.

So it's been lonely at the Gallagher home. I watch Liam here and there but I'm starting to grow impatient. I know I need a place of my own, sleeping on the couch every night is causing back problems which don't help during my shifts at the bar. I almost have enough saved to look at a decent place downtown, but I'm not there yet.

All the apartments around town are starting to increase in rent. It's gentrification. Where am I supposed to afford to live if I can barely afford a decent meal?

Gentrification.

I scramble through my thoughts on apartment hunting as I finish closing up the Alibi. I feel like I'm prolonging my stay at the Gallagher's longer than I should. Maybe staying a few nights at Kev and Vee's would help. But on top of Vee's postpartum and Kev's breastfeeding, I wouldn't want to intrude. They have enough to worry about.

As I finished locking up the front door, I threw my keys in my bag and began my trek home. The summer nights were always my favorite. The cool breeze, the smell of fresh cut grass, and the bright moon shinning to homeless and drunks.

"Lovely night, isn't it?" A voice boomed from behind me.

"Holy fuck!" I screamed as I grabbed my rapidly beating heart.

Once I stopped to turn around, I laughed at the familiar face. My anxiety ridden breathing slowed as I realized it was the stranger from a few nights before. Julian.

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