Don't Judge Me, Judge Yourself Sis

Try Again

"What the fuck?" I say
"What the fuck?" says Tim
"What the fuck?" says Troy. Me and Tim look at Troy confused. "What? I wanted to be included."
"I don't know you, but I'm just going to assume I'm not gonna like you. " I say to Troy. He holds open his mouth offended. "So you're the plus one?" I ask Tim, looking at him up and down with my arms crossed.
"I would have had plans if this girl would have texted me back " Tim says squinting at me.
" Oh, so none of your hoes answered so you decided to make yourself available ? No vaginas were vacant tonight? Ooooor?" I say rolling my neck.
"Are you a hoe?" Tim asks sarcastically
"Did you fuck?" I clap back. Everyone gets quiet. "I can't be a hoe if you didn't get the pussy nigga !" I raise my voice clapping after each word.
"You are so extra " Tim says exhaling and shaking his head
"Ya motha a bitch, now what? " I clap back pointing my finger in his face.
" I wasn't calling you a hoe, I was being sarcastic! " Tim raised his voice in frustration.
"Oh , so now you wanna-"
"Can you shut the fuck up for one second!" Tim yells cutting me off. I shut up and ball up my fists. I should punch this nigga in the face, but I decide to let him speak because I kind of did just call his momma a hoe."I wanted to make plans with you Kali. You. But you've been ignoring me , damn" Tim brings his voice to a speaking octave.
"Oh" I say awkwardly. I look around and everyone is staring at us.
"So , I'm just going to assume you two know each other ?" says Troy slowly. We both turn to his direction giving him an evil look. " I'm just gonna walk inside now " Troy brushes past me and Lisa still standing in the doorway.
"Well, I'm Lisa " Lisa says awkwardly giving Tim a church hug . " And your name is , Tim? Right? " she continued awkwardly.
"Yea." Tim responds still glaring at me.
"I brought drinks." James finally speaks awkwardly holding up a bag of Hennessy and coke.
"Y'all can come in " I say , giving everyone the hand motion to the living room. "Looks like you know where I live now " I say to Tim as I walk toward the living room.
Everyone is seated in the living room while music is playing low in the background. The tv is on, but muted and everyone is having side conversations. Across from me, Lisa is sitting in between Troy and James giggling about God knows what. Troy and James are both equally handsome men. Troy is about 6'1, light skin , medium built , with big lips. He has a strong country accent , mainly because he's from Suffolk,VA. His hair dreaded up past his shoulders. I'm sure he's half white, I just haven't cared enough to ask. He has dreads so it's even harder to tell. James is dark skin, which is my favorite shade of people. He has big lips and almond shaped eyes. He's tall as well, about 6'3 and slim built. It's just something about those dark , tall, skinny niggas, my God. I look over at Tim and he's in his phone to the left of me. I feel like I should be the bigger person and apologize about how I treated him. But I won't , because well, I'm me.
"What are you doing punk?" I say to Tim in a playful manner.
"Nothing really. Just on Instagram. " he responds.
" I should have texted you back , I just. um. Yea" I say awkwardly looking down at my phone.
"You wanna take a picture with me?" Tim says biting his bottom lip.
"That's not gonna upset your hoes, is it?" I say to Tim , giving him the side eye slightly smiling.
"I told you, I don't have hoes. If I did, I wouldn't entertain them. I'm a one girl kinna guy." Tim says . I can hear the sincerity in his voice.  He holds his phone above us and we take the picture. It's cute or whatever.
"Hashtag , homegirl" I say giving Tim a playful punch on the shoulder.
"Hashtag , new bae " Tim says biting his lip.
"Anyway!" I start laughing. "Speaking of new baes , how's your love life? "
"I think I'm ready for something new" Tim responds.
"Well, any girls in mind?" I try to sound uninterested.
"You" Tim says not hesitating.  I immediately start to blush. At this point I'm glad I'm dark skin because it would be extremely obvious. "Can we try again ?"
"Try what again ?" I say trying to sound confused.
"Whatever this was." Tim's voice lowers.  I look over and see that none of the others are paying us any mind. In fact , Troy and James are both too much in Lisa's face to notice anything.
"I thought you were happy to have me as a 'friend'" I air quote the word "friend".
"I am. But obviously there's more between us, right?" Tim says looking directly in my eyes.
"I mean , I guess" I say softly , still trying to sound uninterested. I'm not fooling anyone though.
" Lets try again. " Tim grabs my hands together.
"Well, if at first you don't succeed" I say shrugging my shoulders. "Try try try again" I say smiling.
" I love Aaliyah " Tim says shaking his head smiling.
" William Edward Hickson" I squint at Tim.
"Who?" Tim says confused. 
"My nigga , the original saying comes from Hickson. Aaliyah just sang a song about an old saying"  I say giggling.
"Who actually knows that?" Tim says scrunching up his face and squinting.
"Me" I put one hand out in the "duh" motion.
We both start laughing.
A few hours go by , and so does a few drinks. Troy is passed out drunk on the couch , I'm sitting on Tims lap whispering and giggling, while Lisa and James had been in the bathroom fucking for the past 45 minutes.
"She has an ugly moan" I say to Tim trying to restrain my laughter.
"It's like the Asian girls in Asian porn. Short high pitched sounds " Tim says snickering
"Or like -"
"Anime Porn!" We say in unison , laughing extremely hard.  The moans and knocks continue in the background.
" I hope this bitch don't break my toilet " I say looking back at the bathroom .
"He beating that thang up though" Tim says playfully.
"I don't know , I feel like her moans are over exaggerated. At this point , she's starting to sound like a pikachu " I say in a matter of fact tone.
"Good point." Tim agrees sliding his hand down his face.
"IM BOUT TO CUM!" screams James from inside the bathroom . We cover our mouths laughing hard. "Uuuuuuh uuuuuuh uuuuuuuuh ohhh fuuuuuck"  he continues.
"You make sure you clean up any damn body fluid in that damn bathroom! I don't want to see no nut juice or fucking period stains!" I yell toward the bathroom.
"Period stains?!" Tim responds looking shocked.
"I feel like Lisa fucked that nigga on her period. She don't give a fuck " I say nonchalantly.
"Bruuuuuh" Tim says , mouth wide open.
"Have my bathroom looking like a damn art project." I start yelling toward the bathroom again. "And make sure you spray ! I don't want to smell your enchilada collard green pussy bitch "
"Huh ?!" Tim starts laughing.
"You know , because she's Spanish and black . So id imagine her pussy smell like -"
"Ok , I get it " Tim playfully pushes me while laughing.
James and Lisa both exit the bathroom. James , with a big grin on his face. Lisa , with disappointment on hers.
"See, told you. " I whisper to Tim.
"Well it's getting late , I think I'm about to head out " says James with a fake yawn. He reaches for his half drank bottle of Hennessy. I snatch it from the table before he can. 
"Uh uh homeboy. You don't bring bottles and take bottles from this house. Ghetto ass." I look at him up and down.
" I'm saying , y'all didn't finish it so I can crush that tomorrow " James says grinning
"Naw, it was technically a gift. Bye now " I give him the one hand finger wave . He sucks his teeth and heads toward the door. Lisa gives him a hug before he leaves and locks the door behind him. " What about his friend?" I look toward Troy on my couch.
"Actually Troy was my ride " says Tim putting his hand behind his neck.
"Well, y'all can stay the night. I don't need anyone drinking and driving then dying." I say very nonchalantly.
"Aww you care about me?" Tim says kissing me on the cheek.
" I was actually thinking about the fact that Troy is only 20 and since he drank here, if he gets a DUI or dies I can be held responsible" I get off Tims lap and kisses him on the forehead.
"You're a real class act, you know that?" Tim says following me up the stairs.
"I'm just looking out for myself my nigga" I turn , facing him at the top of the steps next to my room. He wraps his arms around me. He smells like expensive cologne and Hennessy. The smell of weed lingers on him. I don't mind it though. When we hug I get chills running through my body down my spine. Tim could hug me , and all my worries would go away. He makes me feel secure. I hope I make him feel the same. After pulling away from the hug , we head towards my room. I turn around to yell down the steps.
"Did you get a blanket Lisa?"
"Yea, I'm laying on the couch now girl. " she responds .
"You can sleep in the spare room girl , I mean .. there's an air mattress in there but it's something" I continue yelling downstairs.
"I like watching tv before I go to sleep , so I'll sleep in the living room" says Lisa
" ok, does that boy need a blanket " I say sounding like somebody momma
"I got him one already girl " Lisa responds like she's my child.
"Ok hoe " I say playfully , but part of me meant it.
I turn back around to my room and Tim is already in my bed with his shirt off. I take of everything but my bra and panties. I reach in my drawer and grab a long t shirt and put it on. I cuddle up next to Tim , placing my head on his chest while his arm drapes around me. My head moves up and down as he breathes.
"Can I ask you something?" The bass in his voice makes my ear vibrate , and it slightly tickles.
"Whaaaaat?" I try to sound irritated but I'm interested.
"Why don't you have a boyfriend?" Tim asks sincerely.
"I don't trust niggas. It's simple. " I respond nonchalantly.
"Not all dudes are bad dudes" Tim says holding me a little tighter.
" I know, but I have a motto. If he puts milk in his cereal , he a fuck boy." I say in my usual matter-of-fact tone.
"What?" Tim says laughing.
"Yup . I live by that." I respond in my best British accent.
"So, if she got titties , she a hoe?" Tim says cleverly
"You have the right idea sir " I continue in my British accent.
"But that means , you barely a hoe" Tim says jokingly
"Touché , my good man " I say giggling. " If he loves his momma, he will cheat on you" I say slightly singing.
"Well, I don't fuck with my moms so, I'm faithful" Tim says playfully.
"That's not nice " I respond giggling.
"But I'm serious. " Tims laughter dies down.
"Why not ?" I ask curiously , my tone changes.
"My parents didn't raise me , my aunt and uncle did. My mom was a drug addict and my dad is in jail " Tim says , his voice softening.
"Oh wow , that sucks " I say awkwardly. " I mean , I'm sorry you had to go through that" I squeeze him slightly while still laying on his chest.
"It's alright. I'm who I am today because of it, and I'm happy with myself" Tim's words are full of confidence.
"You should be. You're a great guy " I say sincerely.
"That's probably the nicest thing you've ever said to me" Tim responds , smirking.
"Shut up stupid " I say squinting my eyes
"You stupid " he says trying to tickle me
"Ya motha" I clap back. " and now I don't have to feel bad when I say it " I pucker my lips up at Tim.
"You're fucked up" Tim says giggling and kisses me right on my puckered lips. "You know what my favorite thing about you is ?" Tim asks with sincerity in his voice.
"My ass?"
"No"
"My lips?"
"No"
"My eyes?"
"No"
"This mouth ?"
Tim pauses.... "No"
"I'm running out of body parts ." I respond rolling my eyes.
"My favorite thing about you is you speak your mind. You're honest. You make me laugh like no other person. You're adventurous, and independent . You're just one of a kind " says Tim while holding me.
"Yea... that was like 5 things. I would have nev-"
"Will you be my girlfriend?" Tim asks cutting me off. I open my mouth to respond, but my response is interrupted by screams. Lisa's screams downstairs.