Your Forgotten

• xxi •

Double update :) please don't forget to read the chapter before this ❤

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(part 4)

Back to normal. Like nothing ever happened.

The tiles glistened like it wasn't the same one that tasted the pool of crimson liquid an hour ago. The house was back to its deafening quietness like it never heard the screams that tainted it's walls.

For a moment I could've easily lied to myself that everything was just a nightmare of which I had awaken from and was now back to the reality of silent wars and choking silence.

But my mind did me the favours of imagining you scrubbing the floors, attending to his wounds and cleaning up my mess like always and I almost broke down for the second time in that empty hallway.

After painfully dragging my heavy self through the steps, I stood in front of your door but my shame pulled my folded hands down like an anchor, so I turned around and continued dragging myself to my room.

Nothing prepared me for the sight of you sitting on my room floor with your back to the wall, head bowed and legs sprawled  out in front of you like a lost child.

You've never looked so small.

But when the door announced my arrival,  you looked up and your eyes met and held each mine, transmitting intense waves of emotions that I think I'm still too young to fully comprehend.

For the third time today I almost broke down but I shut the door and stood behind it, my eyes never leaving yours.

You stood to your full height and for what felt like eternity we simply stood there, letting unspoken words build a massive wall between us.

"I've never been more ashamed in my entire life" you said, with a voice so abrasive I had to blink twice.

With all the storm of words brewing inside me "I'm sorry" was the single raindrop that fell out.

"Sorry for what?" Your voice turned acidic in a matter of seconds leaving a sharp bitter taste in my mouth. I left your eyes and sought the floor for answers to your question.

"Mola, what are you sorry for?" My throat hurt as I swallowed and I wasn't sure if it was due to all the tears or the sourness of your words.

"I don't know" I was sorry for a lot of things that I didn't know where to start from or what exactly you wanted to hear so I stuck with an easy way out.

"What did I do wrong Mola? I work hard day and night so you don't have anything to worry about. I still try to make you happy whenever I can make out time." Your voice was getting louder and I was the one feeling smaller now with each words but you continued.

"I'm trying so hard please everyone but no one sees or appreciates my hard work. You people just want to suck me dry of every thing I have left. So answer me Mola, WHAT DID I DO WRONG?!"

My lips were quivering and I wanted to shout back too,  but it was too hard to pick out words from all the hurricane of alphabets in the pit of my stomach.

So I still sought the floor for answers to all the questions we both had.

"I know what you've been doing. Everytime I live for work to make your life better, everytime I go to bed and force myself to still my head and sleep. I know what you've been doing."

I finally looked up to your brown eyes that now looked black as tears ran down your cheeks.

What did you know? What happened while I was gone for an hour?

"I know the secrets you've been hiding inside your room. I've seen it all. Everything."

My heartbeat pounded in my ears as I looked at you with round eyes.

What was I hiding? Was it my letters to you? Did you see the letters?

I swallowed again and felt the biting pain in my throat again.

"I've never been more ashamed in my entire life Mola." your voice was reduced to a whisper as your repeated your first words.

"I don't know the path you want to follow in your life, but I'm trying. I know it's not easy seeing your parents fight but I paid a huge amount of money to send you to the dormitory so you don't have to live with that trauma, so you can focus on your studies. But you still remain ungrateful Mola"

You moved closer to me as I opened my mouth to say that I was sorry again but the words didn't come out and left my mouth hanging open.

You brought your hands forward and unfolded it, revealing my lighter and pack of cigarette.

I wasn't sure I remembered how to breathe in that moment. The words finally left my open mouth "I'm sorry."

"After everything Mola. This is the route you want to take in your journey." The tears were flowing steadily on your face. Your voice was so low but made its impact on my conscience.

"I've never been more ashamed."

Dropping the cigarette on the floor you slammed the door behind you and for the fourth time today I wanted to break down.

So I did.

I took your previous position on the floor and wept.

I heard your door close and it echoed through the house, then the accustomed suffocating silence followed behind.

Just like that.

Back to normal. Like nothing ever happened.

Your Forgotten,
Mola.