Chapter 46 - Entire ecosystem & happy holidays

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The thing about Thanksgiving day was it was a complete shit show, from start to finish, and it was also somehow one of the best days of my life. I woke up because Louis barged into my room screaming about a kitten. At first, I thought I was dreaming, but then all of a sudden there were little paws on my face and wet spots pressed against my eyebrow, and Louis was squealing at the foot of my bed.

Sleepily opening one eye, I was greeted to the sight of a tiny grey fur ball staring back at me. "Holy shit," I mumbled, rubbing the goo out of the corners of my eyes, "Is this what I think it is?"

"If you think it's the most adorable thing you've ever seen, then yes. Yes it is."


He smiled brightly up at me. "The little guy was curled up underneath the bottom of the stairs, and Jace dropped his keys, so me being the amazing boyfriend I am, I crawled under there to get them, and came out with a kitten."

"And so, naturally, you bring it to my apartment instead of your own?"

"Jace wanted it," Louis whined. Then all of the sudden his chin was resting on the edge of my bed, head propped up right next to the kitten. He gave me wide doe eyes and pouted (not looking half as cute as the ball of fur that was about half the size of his head). "Can we keep him"?

With another pout from him, and the kitten letting out a quiet little yawn, my resolve didn't last longer than ten seconds. "As long as I get to name him."

There were immediate protests at that compromise. Louis and I argued until Jace came in brandishing a huge knife that he threatened to use on us instead of the turkey. Reluctantly, both Louis and I followed my roommate into the kitchen and plopped down around the table.

He glared at us both from his place behind the counter. "You two are ridiculous. So ridiculous, in fact, that I revoke naming abilities from both of you. I get to name him, instead. And I choose the name Alfred.

"Absolutely not," I hissed.

Louis made a disgusted face at his boyfriend. "That is possibly the worst name for a cat ever."

We ended up arguing for another thirty minutes. Louis insisted on the name Optimus Prime (Honestly, who wouldn't want a cat named after a transformer? Name one person), while I was set on Pharell (Look at this fucking cat. It's a Pharell. 100%). On the other hand, Jace really loved the name Caesar (He's just so majestic. He's classical).

We ended up naming the cat 2 Chainz. Afterwards, not one of us could remember how we ended up naming the innocent grey kitten after a rapper who'd been arrested on multiple occasions for possession and illegal firearms. But 2 Chainz meowed at us when we called him, and that was that.

*       *       *       *

The next disaster happened around noon. I was sitting on the couch because they wouldn't let me anywhere near the kitchen on account of my cooking abilities (or lack thereof) when a blood-curling  scream echoed out of the cooking area.

I scrambled off the comfortable chair and sprinted down the hall to find Jace sitting on the floor of the kitchen with 2 Chainz in his lap, staring at the turkey in horror. And by turkey, I mean the unrecognisable slab of meat that was in the large silver pan on the stove.

"Jace," I said quietly, "What did you do?"

He let out a quiet whimper, lower lip trembling in distress. "I don't...I don't know. One minute I'm playing with 2 Chainz and then the next thing you know, our turkey has somehow managed to collapse in upon itself in the oven. It's. It's dead, Norah. I killed our turkey."

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