Chapter #32

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Chapter #32: I Had Loved, and Been Loved


It was 7 o'clock in the evening when I had realised Evan and I had over stayed our visit at New Jersey. I sat in the passenger seat while Evan was driving, my thoughts consuming my mind. I could see the Pizza sign flashing from a distance, but I didn't really have an appetite. My back hurt and this morning had been a big weight on my shoulder, exposing myself so intimately to the boy I was in love with. I was thinking about so many things at once that I couldn't even think straight.

The drive was quiet and peaceful and my hand was warmly resting in Evan's hand, as he was focused on the road with his left hand on the steering wheel. I looked down to our hands, and felt happy inside. It was a weird kind of happy though- I don't even know if you could consider it happy, it was more of a 'I feel so happy right now but as soon as I get back to New York I know things are going to go insane' kind of feeling.

I felt like I couldn't really be happy long term wise. I always felt happy during the moment but when it came to thinking of tomorrow or the next day, I got worried, and anxious. Somehow, just looking at Evan, my feelings of unease faded away.

I let my thoughts drift as Evan pulled up to the Pizza Parlour and opened his door, letting go of my hand briefly and smiling gently. All of our bags were in the back of the truck, since we were planning on leaving after having our late dinner. I sighed, waiting a moment before opening the door and walking to Evan. He took a hold of my hand and led me inside, the strong smell of pepperoni pizza making my nose tickle.

We sat at a booth, not one word was said yet until the waitress came up to us and asked what we'd like to order.

"Hawaiian pizza please, medium sized slice," I said briefly without even bothering to open the menu book.

"And for you?" she grinned.

"Mushroom, medium sized."

Once she jotted down our orders and walked away, I let my back rest against the comfy back of the booth. "I'm exhausted."

"I can tell," Evan chuckled lightly, rubbing his tired red eyes.

Today had been a lazy day, we stayed in bed all day cuddling in the warmth of one another until we acknowledged that we had to leave New Jersey. It was odd, sad even. Being in the warmth of someone else, completely oblivious to all the wrong in the world. And then to realize you had to leave, because reality is out there waiting for you.

"What are we going to do about school? We were supposed to be back Monday. It's Thursday," I explained, rubbing my temples harshly. My head throbbed.

I genuinely hadn't even thought of school, or any of my classes. In the back of my mind, I felt awfully guilty for ignoring my courses, and the projects that were do. I giggled to myself at the fact that Evan and I had failed our Health project with a 43 percent. Half of the reason why is because we lost Paxton.

He looked up at me, raising an eyebrow. "Why are you laughing?"

I shrugged. "What happened to our Health project, Evan?"

I held back a laugh as Evan fell into deep thought, before jumping when coming to the realization that we did in fact fail our project. "Oh shit! Paxton!"

We laughed together, and I shook my head. "That poor baby. We abused him."

"It was dumb project anyways," he chuckled, his eyes glowing.

We sat quiet for a moment, before I asked again what the plan was.

"I don't know, Peyton," he sighed, placing his elbows on the table. "Are we failing senior year?" he joked.

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