Chapter 1 ~ 29th of July 2005

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Today was magical.

Before today, I started with hopes and dreams.
You know, those kind of dreams almost every person had in his life.

Being famous.

When I told people I've always wanted to become a famous singer,
they didn't do anything but laughing.

I started thinking.

I had to pick someone as my rolemodel. Whether it was just my mom, or a celebrity. It had to be someone that would inspire me along the way.

Unfortunately my family doesn't support me in almost everything I say or do. Despite that, they're still my #1. I love them and I'm lucky to have such a big family. There's one problem: I'm definitely NOT their #1. They don't show me the necessary support, they laugh at me when I start talking and my cousin doesn't even invite me when she celebrates her birthday. And at the moments I start talking about the fact I want to become famous, they start laughing out loud and tell me I have to keep dreaming, because "I'd never succeed in becoming famous."

I went through the list of all the people in my class. Their abilities and dreams were written in a special box next to their names.

Jordan: Plays American football - wants to become a professional quarterback.
Marilyn: Loves to draw - wants to become a famous draw-artist.

And the list kept going..

At the end of the list there was one person.

Demi: Loves to sing and act - Just wants to help people.

I stared at her picture for like five minutes. I don't know what happened, but I kinda freezed. Why didn't I ever start a conversation with her?

Demi is always in the back of the class. Alone.
For some reason nobody wants to sit next to her.

Sometimes I look at her. When she sees me, she smiles.

She seems to be a normal teenage girl. In the back of the class, doing her stuff.
Nothing to worry about.

Well, I have to admit something.
I've always wondered two things.

1) Why do I feel guilty when I look at her?
2) Why doesn't she look happy most of the time?

I felt guilty, because whenever I screamed through the class: "O my gosh, I hate my life. There is a huge pimple on my chin!", Demi hated everything about her life and herself at the same time.

I felt guilty, because whenever I asked someone if my pants made me look fat, Demi was insecure about her body at the same time.

And why didn't I or others notice that? That's because people, including me and you, are blind.

This 'normal' teenage girl wasn't 'that girl in the back of the class'. This 'normal' teenage girl wasn't 'that girl who always seems to smile'.

I wished that we people could look deeper. Deeper inside the person. Then we'd see the real person behind the beautiful smile.

Today I looked at Demi. She was drawing. When she saw that I looked at her, she gave me that well-known smile. I stood up, picked up my stuff and walked towards the table next to Demi. Demi looked at me like I just did something really weird. I asked if it was okay if I came to sit next to her. She nodded and went back to drawing.

Something happened.

I looked at Demi again and realised she's the most beautiful girl I've seen. She noticed that I looked at her again. For a moment we stared into each other's eyes. Demi said: "Why are you looking at me like that?" I shook my head and said: "I don't know. You're just... So beautiful.."

You know how to see the difference between a REAL smile and a FAKE smile? The eyes.

If you see someone smiling, imagine the mouth not being there. Only look at the eyes.
Are they laughing? The smile is real.
Aren't they laughing? The smile is fake.

Demis eyes were getting bigger.

"Do you really think I'm beautiful?" Demi asked. I laughed and said: "Yes! You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen! How come we never talked before?!" Demi laughed and said: "I don't know."

We were still staring at each other.

All of a sudden I saw tears popping out of Demis eye. "What's wrong? What have I done? Did I say something wrong? Oh, sorry!!" I said full of panic. "Calm down. These are tears of happiness!" Demi said. I started thinking. "I... I don't understand..." I said. Demi laughed again. "I feel accepted for what I look like, for who I am... For the first time in my entire life." She said and she smiled.

But this time, her eyes were smiling too. For the first time.

I just made someone's day. By telling the truth. If there's any wonderful gift to a person like Demi, it's making them happy. And it feels amazing.

It really does.

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