Backfired

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Mugged, betrayed, beaten and hurt......if someone asked me to raise my hands to that question then I would do it. I was so fed up with everything that I had already tried commiting suicide thrice. Life was fucking me up. Won't let me go to death. At this point I was in a stage where I could justify having wet dreams for the grim reaper. I had a major breakup too but I wasn't the kind of guy to whine about a break-up. I was the kind who was dying inside coz his friends betrayed him. The break-up just made me feel helpless. At this point life looked like an endless torture just fucking me up left and right.
I crossed eyes with this girl I had a minor crush. She looked cute and I didn't really know her well. She smiled and I smiled back. I proceeded to my class and sat in the corner. No one really liked sitting with me. After all my so called friends ruined my reputation. This was everyday. Just gloomy sad and depressing. The day was going on and soon I was on my way to my next class and I saw my crush making out with someone. I wasn't hurt or anything but it did make me a little sad. "Fuck this drama" I said as I left for home. Like I told you I had picked up the hobby of origiami and kirigami. These people from class came and spoiled my giant kuani I made. I was so fed up that I muttered "change". I grabbed my books and rushed home. I was searching hypes on the internet. Started reading so freaking much. Spent my pocket money on books. Saw television in free time. In 2 months I was insomniac and binged and caught up with more than 20 television series and a hell lot of books. Nothing could go wrong. Right? I thought the same. Got my hair cut and changed my style. I became everything I never was. I felt socialising and starting conversations was gonna be super easy. I entered my class and tried concersing.
Now I knew stuff more than other people combined. It made me feel so celestial. People started hating me more. I was annoyingly talkative and knew so much stuff that people didn't wanna know. My whole plan backfired and I was broken. Everything I did and tried was all gone to waste.
This went on for months and I became so depressed that the point of dying didn't leave my mind. One fine day my only friend also betrayed me and I felt dead inside. "What's the point of this physical life?" I asked myself as I was walking home. I grabbed a razor blade and took a good look at my room. I sat on my bed resting my back against the wall. I slowly started pressing the blade against my wrist as I gave up on life expecting it to give up on me too..........

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