I sat on the couch in the lonely night, the house a dark shadow around me. The place was silent; Emelyne had already gone to bed, leaving me with my thoughts alone.
Maybe what I'd said back there hadn't been appropriate considering the moment, especially after the way she'd kissed me, but would it have been better to go on believing everything was just fun and games.
Emelyne had kissed me because of the emotions she'd been holding back all day long, with the upcoming wedding and then Rebeka's death... it had all crashed down on her.
That could be the only possible reason.
I knew she could never really love me. She loved someone else, not me.
My heart continued to hurt from the feeling deep inside, it was bursting with words unsaid. But I was too scared to admit it to her, to voice my love aloud, afraid she wouldn't return it.
Could you blame me? It wasn't as if I fell in love every day. This feeling was too new for me, almost unknown.
Why couldn't things just be how I'd planned, to marry her and eventually try working things out. I mean, I'd never believed in divorce from the beginning.
But maybe divorce was the right thing after all. If it could put Emelyne at ease knowing she wasn't going into this for the long haul, then that's what was going to happen.
I leaned back and rested my head on the couch, shutting my eyes and trying to get rid of all the turmoil in my head.
I could hear the clock ticking in the silence, but I also knew that Casey wasn't asleep yet. Something told me he was awake as well, possibly suffering just as I was.
When he'd driven me home after the argument at the park, I had come straight to my room and shut the door in his face.
Maybe I'd been too harsh, but it had been necessary to show him how angry he made me at times.
How could he passionately kiss me one second, and then draw back the next? Just when I thought he would be able to love me half as much as I loved him, he turned it all around and threw it in my face.
His words had definitely stung.
I heard footsteps outside the door; it sounded a lot like pacing, frustrated pacing.
I wanted to go out there and say something, to get all the thoughts out of my head. But I was scared that I was going to end up revealing too much, which Casey could use to his advantage later.
What if I told him I loved him, and he ended up laughing at me!? Saying I was just a way to get the council off their backs, and my involvement is just temporary.
I sighed and hugged my pillow tight, drawing any comfort that I could.
It was late now, and still sleep didn't come to me. The pacing outside the door continued, sometimes stopping for a while, and then starting all over again.
It was clear that Casey had a lot on his mind as well, maybe he was thinking hard just like I was.
But it hurt me that his thoughts were entirely different than mine. While I lay here worrying over a love that could never be returned, he was probably worried about his "temporary" marriage plans getting ruined.
Well, he was going to be surprised all right!
Emelyne Sherwood did not break a promise... ever! So I was going to make sure he knew tomorrow that just because he had the heart to hurt me with his cruel words, I wasn't going to back down from what I'd promised him.
Instead, why not tell him now!?
I got up from my bed before I could change my mind, my sudden courage driving me outside without considering putting something on.
In my night dress, just above the hips, and nothing else to cover over it, I stepped out of the room and found Casey looking out the condo's windows.
He must have heard me, since he quickly turned around and stared.
At first, it seemed awkward and weird the way he just stood there, his eyes wide and assessing.
But then I realized he was staring at my outfit, or the lack of it.
I looked down at my barely clad body, the spaghetti straps of the thin shift starting to fall off one shoulder.
Fixing it, I suddenly felt stupid for rushing out without a second thought. But that didn't stop me from frowning back at Casey, causing him to snap out of it and clear his throat in embarrassment.
"Is everything okay? Why are you awake?" he asked.
I swallowed, drawing some of the courage I'd had earlier.
"I need to tell you something." I said quietly.
He looked confused, but when I decided to speak again he stopped me.
"First, I should probably apologize about..." I didn't let him finish either, not wanting to hear an apology from him.
I didn't need to hear him say he was sorry, that he should've kept his mouth shut. He'd made the decision to say those harsh words, about shattering my hope.
Now, he could sit there for the rest of his existence and suffer!
I almost giggled at the ferocity of my thoughts, maybe I was taking it too far... but I still wasn't ready to hear him apologize. Not until he actually meant it. And I knew he didn't mean it.
"Don't say you're sorry, Casey. Not until you mean it with all your heart, or whatever is left of your heart." I said angrily.
He flinched, my words hitting him hard. I regretted it for a second, but remembered why I'd come out here in the first place.
"And don't ever even open your mouth to say a word after kissing me like that! If you need to let someone down, do it when you just haven't kissed the living daylights out of them!" I continued, my voice rising.
Nothing could stop me now, I felt the courage double and the intimidation leave me. All of a sudden I felt like I could open up completely and say anything I wanted to.
Casey just stood there, and I could've sworn there was a hint of a smile on his face. His reaction angered me further, and I took a step towards him.
"You think you're smart, don't you? Just because you're rich and handsome and have the perfect life! You think someone like me can be used and trashed within seconds!?" I yelled, poking him in the chest with my finger.
He cocked an eyebrow, and it felt more like a challenge then simple amusement.
I took another step forward, practically touching from head to toes. My body stuck to his, I looked up into his face and snorted. A very un-ladylike snort.
"Let me tell you something, mister. I am not going to back out of our little agreement, you understand! I will marry you!" I said with as much emotion I could muster.
"Oh, yeah? And why would you do that?" he asked, his voice practically taunting me.
I narrowed my eyes and stared into his eyes, unable to stop the words from spilling out.
"Because I love you, dummy!"
I WANT TO APOLOGIZE TO ALL MY FANS WHO'VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG.
I WAS SO BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND NOW I'LL BE EVEN BUSIER, SINCE
EXAMS HAVE JUST BEGUN.
BUT BE PATIENT, MY AWESOME FANS, AND I PROMISE THE NEXT ONE WILL
BE A LONG AND MEMORABLE CHAPTER!!!
YOU ARE READING
I'm Falling In Love ... and It's ARRANGED!? (on hold)Teen Fiction
Casey Luongo meets Emelyne Sherwood unexpectedly, and the two don't take long to fall head over heels in love. But how long can they keep an age old family feud and a psycho stalker from ruining what they've found. It doesn't help much that Casey wa...