Diary Entry - Eundeok Married Life (Baekhera) [COMPLETED]

Too late

Soondeok's diary

I really don't want this holiday to end, I had such a great time with Eun. Thinking of Eun as my boyfriend was easier than I first thought. Indeed...the things we've been doing together so far did seem more like what will be done between dating couples rather than siblings anyway. I miss the people in the capital though, I hope they are doing alright.

Last night, guess what Eun said to me? Oh my gosh, I'm blushing as I'm remembering it. We were just chatting on bed when he suddenly searched all over my body saying, 'Deok ah, give it back! Why did you steal it? Where is it?' I was confused of course, I insisted that I didn't take anything from him then he sounded all serious and said, 'Deok ah! Why did you do that? Why did you take away my heart? Why did you steal it? Did you ask for my permission before you take my heart away? Where did you put it? Tell me, where is my heart? Give it back!' I laughed so hard, making it difficult for Eun to hold it in and then he laughed too. He was joking, of course, but I loved how he said it – made my heart flatter. I think I'm the luckiest girl on earth – to be able to hear him say that to me. Am I dreaming? It all seem too good to be true!

But, will this last? It was just a year ago or so that Eun's deeply in love with Haesoo, but now he starts to like me...will he get bored with me then love someone else later? After all, it's human nature to change. Will I change? So far that has never come across my mind, but I'm afraid one day...I'm afraid one day I'll go crazy and stop loving Eun. Oh, please don't let that happen.

I think I'm worrying too many things at the same time...I need to learn how to relax, like the prince. Thanks to him, I've been able to have fun every now and then – not following the rules and such. If we have kids now...will we be good parents? I do hope so, I want to be good parents to our kids, I want to give them a good childhood, unlike the prince's and mine...

Eun's diary

We should be back in the capital by noon today. This holiday is just absolutely fabulous. Is it because I told Soondeok I want to be her boyfriend instead of her brother? I can't help but grin every time I think of her now. Yet what is wrong with me? I should be able to say the words "I love you" to her by now...yet every time, every single time I wanted to say it, it gets stuck in my throat, like some fish bone stuck there that can't get out...do I not love her? Soondeok said it's because my heart's not ready yet. Is that why? Oh I don't know! It's so hard to distinguish between liking someone and loving someone...will Soondeok know the answer to that? Can she feel my interest towards her? And my past...will I be able to tell her everything one day?

She's outside, she said she wanted to thank the inn keeper before we leave, which will be soon. Such an angel of her...I remember I used to hate her for it, I was such a devil back then. I know mother will be at the temples but I have this faint hope that when I walk through the gate of our house, mother will come out and welcome me home...I miss her.