Learn the Universal Language

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Learn and try to speak English. That's the one thing that you had to learn if you want to keep up with me. Learning this language could extremely boost your self-confidence. Like me, since I already mastered it, I could now say that I have every rights to speak to almost everyone without a single doubt on my part. That's because I had gained my self-confidence.

Some of you might say that I am overflowing with self-confidence. But what can I do? I could speak in English, I'm intelligent, well, I'm handsome and hot. Now could you blame me why I'm overflowing with it? Look, I'm not bragging, but I am just simply stating things that I truly possess. Haters gonna hate, I don't care. I'm just telling the truth.

Most people here on watty prefer not to speak with me just because I only speak in English. That's so low. Pathetic. They are just showing me how unworthy they are of my time and breath. Completely hopeless. Don't be like them, try to communicate with people speaking English and try your best to reply. Maybe at first, you'll fail, but in due time, I guarantee you that you would make a progress.

Ah, I forgot to say to you guys that I brought my twin brother with me. Today, he doesn't know that I'm gonna teach him how to-

Ean: Dougie!"

-Dougie. Wait, what?! No, no, that's not it. I'm going to teach him how to-

Ean: Drink coffee para mahiya ka naman.

-Drink co- tsk! English! I'm going to teach him to speak English. Haven't I told you guys that he's such a loser on speaking in our universal language? I'll show you...

Ean, let's have a conversation.

Ean: Aba! May sakit ka ba Caelum? Una, sinama mo ako. Ngayon naman kakausapin mo ko? ~Der ken bi mirakol! Wen you belib! Doh hart is preyl, its hard to kil!~

Stop singing, Ean, geez! It's giving me goosebumps!

Ean: Kinikilabutan ka? Sa ganda ng boses ko 'yan!

No, it's not that. Your voice, it's like a dying pig!

Ean: Awts! Ang sama mo pa rin pala! Ayoko na nga dito, nang-aaway ka-

No, stay! I have to teach you how to speak in English!

Ean: English? Magaling naman ako diyan eh! Hindi na kaila-

Not really, to tell you the truth...

Geez, I think I have to lie.

... I'm quite worried for your future. You can't speak in English properly. As your twin brother that loves you so much-

Urgh! Kill me now!

- I had to help you. Let me help you!

Ean: Naks! Mahal naman pala ako, away away pa. Pa-hug nga! Ayiie!

*punches him on his face*

Ean: Aray! Kala ko ba bati na tayo? Baka naman kiss gusto mo! Tae ka, Caelum! Magkamukha tayo, tas nababading ka sa akin? Tutustahin kita!

What? Of course not! H-here...




*brought back to life by my sheer coolness*


Ean: Sa wakas, bati na rin tayo! Oh, game! Turuan mo na ako ng English! Excited na ako. Por da pers taym in poreber. Bati na ang kambal. #CaelAnBromance.

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