Brick Wall (Poetry)

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I use my smile as a brick wall.

It's hard to break through, yet

Simple to put up.



And I hide behind it all too often.

The wall provides comfort;

Blocks out everything,

Both good and bad.

The problem is that the walls are so high

I need ladders to add each brick,

Meaning the layers are harder to lay.

No sunlight is let in,

So it's all


And that darkness consumes me.

It consumes me and I don't even attempt to stop it.

Why waste the little energy I have

On a hopeless cause?

The answer is simple:

I don't.

There's a scary movie reeling through

My mind at all times.

It never ends.

It has a funny title though...


It's sad because it's true.

But when I'm in my little theater,

When the lights are dimmed,

There's too much

Darkness and scariness combined

For me to make it through.

A lot of times...

I don't.

A lot of times,

I cut.

I release the toxin that is my blood,

The evil thing that allows me to live.

The ebb and flow of the red fluid

Sickens me,

But soothes me

When it streams down my leg as

Tears stream down my face,

I smile,

Sit back,

And enjoy the pain.

Why not, right?

I mean, behind this brick wall,

That's my only form of entertainment,

The only thing I can count on,

The only thing I crave.

So when darkness falls behind my

Brick wall,

When the fake smile is no longer,

When I can cry myself to sleep,

When the blood dances and trickles

From my veins,

I smile.

A genuine smile.

Because that's when life is finally





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