The Beginning (GxG)

Chapter 7

-JAMIE'S P.O.V-

I have tried so hard to not talk to her all day.
"She told me that she heard the rumors about your seizures. And saw you crying because everyone was staring and treating you like shit. She said she got sad when she saw that." Abby says.
"I told you not to talk to her about it." I comb my fingers through my hair.
"It's this. This is bullshit."
"Jamie. She more or less fucking said she has feelings for you." Abby is getting pissed.
"We're barely friends. It doesn't make sense. Look at my goddamn wrist and ask yourself 'would I really like her?' Especially if we just became friends." I wanted to cry. I hated getting mad at my friends.
    My own words don't make sense when it comes to Abby. We've always shared a similar feeling for one another. A fear I wouldn't be eniugh, I gave her heart to Mike instead if taking it as my own. But for anyone else to like me like Abby does, would be rare.
    Abby was with me before I had become addicted to the blade. She knew me before my life went to hell. I just got lucky she stayed.
"Listen. I am just telling you what I heard. I asked because I care about what you wanted. You were hurt and sad, I felt like I should at least find out what her problem was. She didn't have a problem, more of a crush." I look down.
"I can't go there again, Abby. I can't deal with someone looking at my medical issues and run. Or look past that but sees my scars and runs because of those. I CAN'T DO IT." I started rubbing tense out of my neck before speaking again.
"I don't mean to get mad. I have Zee treating me like shit. She busted my lip the other day and now I have a bruise on my sto..." I stop myself. It's too late. I fucked up.
"Where, Jamie? Where now?" Abby is turning red.
Rose lifts my shirt and shows Abby. I looks the other way, I don't want to see her face... her judgment.
"Don't do anything stupid to Zee. She will drop it at some point."
"When? When you're on the ground with internal bleeding?" She started yelling at me.
I flinched every time she would raise her voice. I guess Rose notices and she comes closer to hug me. I sit limp in her arms.
"It's not bad. Can we please drop this? I need you Abby. The real you, not the mad you." I could feel tears building up.
People are staring at us at this point. Abby drew attention. I just don't want trouble with Zee... well, more trouble. Abby reached for my hand and I couldn't help but take it and squeeze it.
The bell rings and lunch was over. I hugged Abby before walking with Rose to math. I hope she understood me and what I really needed at the moment. So much hugging but it's alright..
Getting into class and into my seat, I felt something in the room change. Lynn sits next to me. We chat a little about the how are you and stuff. Then we end with a conversation about me being a math genius. Just because I am past 12th doesn't mean I could solve a long fraction without pulling a calculator out of my asshole.
The class ends and Lynn nudges me to catch my attention. I can't believe she...
"Can you tutor me in math? I really need the help." She asks.
"Uh.. s..sure. Text d..details later.." I nod shyly.
I don't know if I wanted to spend time alone with her. I don't know anything anymore. Maybe I wasn't thinking straight.
The day is over and we all headed home. Zee was silent in the car and I never give her a second to talk once we were home. I just go to my room. I need to relax.
Reading my book will relax me, right?

'Speaking to her is like ice in my veins. I couldn't deal with her annoying voice and attitude. She was a total bitch.
I had no choice. Though, my ex beat me... I was on the street with no place to turn but this bitch. I wouldn't be doing this if my brother had a better couch.'

The story switched povs.

'I hated this bitch. She was ungrateful. I opened my house for her because her brother is my best friend. And she treats me like fucking shit.
Whatever. I gave her a job, too. This girl had everything at the moment and yet I was the bad bitch.
After a few days of her bunking in my house, she apologized. And I did too. I brought up how she just kept going back to an abusive relationship and she wanted it. Guess even I took it too far.
I think we're okay now? She's better company when she isn't whining like a bitchbaby.
We started hanging out more. I didn't expect this but I had feelings for her. I've never had love in my 24 years, only fucks and one night stands.
I didn't even care about the people behind the lays either. I just never got attached. Never wanted to. And I don't think I ever will.
My roommate wanted me to go to a party but I needed a date. I didn't feel like calling one of my girls at the second, so I made her go with me. Not made, more like insisted.
The party was fun. She clung to me cause I promised to protect her from these grabby ass teens. That was fine.
She was so innocent. Never cussed to me. Well, I know she had to be thinking it. Everyone fucking hates me. I don't give two shits either.
I pushed her into the pool and I got too close. I had a few beers. But she let me fuck her.
"So much for your innocence" I had gotten up and pulled her with me.
The party was dying down and it sucked. We left the party after she was completely wasted. She'd be funny high.
I put her to bed and went to my room. Night night.'

I am about to fall asleep when I'm done reading... "she'll fall in love with her. It always happens." I sighed before closing my eyes. "Then a tragedy."

I dreamt nothing, which was relaxing in all honesty. I am actually rested. But get up too early. I decided for a jog.
After I run for a good 3 miles around my house, I take a quick shower.
"Jamie. Hurry up. I don't want to be late." Zee said.
She wasn't very rude this morning. She must have gotten laid or something magical happened to her bitchiness. But that didn't last too long after we got in the car.
At school, my heart wouldn't stop racing. Lynn wants me to help her study but I don't know how to respond to it all. She must have forgot to text me about it the last night cause I didn't get anything.
That's okay. Maybe she forgot. But surely Abby and Rose would die to hear this.
Rose looks odd today. Her hair was a little wild and her clothes weren't hers. She just looked weird.
Abby and Rose waved me over and we started a conversation I had no idea I was ready for.
"So Lynn stopped me before we left math yesterday. And asked if I could tutor her."
"You say yes?" I nod to Abby.
"Well, that's good? Your place or hers?" She winks.
"Neither. I don't know. We didn't make plans yet." I shrug.
"But you will, Jamie." Rose was smiling towards me like a moron.
"Yeah, I guess? Whenever she wants to make the plans."
"Cool."
"Abby, I'm sorry for yesterday. I'm sorry in general. I was being an asshole."
"You were but I understood. I was too. I'm just glad you're okay."
The bell rings and we go in our different directions. The day is so slow. So fucking slow.
Lunch runs around and I put in my headphones. I decide to sit alone today. I close my eyes and listened to the beat of the drums before a drop off.
"Take deep breath" I take a deep breath, obeying the words of the lyrics.
"And see." I open my eyes and scream.
Lynn is leaned in close to me about to pull a headphone out. I pulled both headphones out to listen to her.
"Uh. Hi, Jamie. Did I scare you?" She is giggling.
I nod, my face flushing with heat.
"I'm sorry." She keeps laughing at me though.
"Asshole" I mumble under my breath.
"Yes, I am. Thank you."
She fucking heard me. Crap. I didn't mean it to sound bad.
"I..I'm sorry"
"You're good." She has a bright smile.
"So about our study thing." My eyes lowering and linger down at my hands.
"Y..yeah?"
"I was wondering if you wanted to hang out and work on it at my place or something."
"Uh.. T..that would b..be cool"
"We can make more plans. Saturday, probably. Or Friday night." She seems excited.
I look up and look into her eyes. I only smile and nodded. Then the bell rings. Fucking bell.
The rest of the day is over. I go to the courtyard and wait for Zee to be ready to go. I am talking to Abby and Rose.
"Rose, your new getup is weird."
Her face flashes red. "What are you talking about?"
Abby and I shared a glance. Well, she must have noticed it too.
"I guess not" I shrugged her off.
Lynn walks into the courtyard and my heart felt like it was running a marathon. She is so beautiful. I can't take my eyes off of her.
I didn't even notice Zee came up behind me.
"Let's go, bitch" and she kicked me on the back again.
I couldn't breath. A shooting sharp pain went up my spine. My vision become dark and I feel myself topple over.
I hear voices. There is ringing in my ears. I hear Abby and Zee yelling at each other. I hear her... I hear Lynn.
My world goes dark and all voices died down.