Chapter 27 | Torn Into Two
Everything felt numb. I was sitting on my bed replaying every moment of what just happened, in my mind. To be honest, I didn't know what to feel. It was a mixture of anger and sadness rolled into one.
How could I be so stupid?
I knew that I shouldn't have gotten involved with him. It should have just been strictly tutoring.
My mind wandered everywhere and filled with so many unanswered questions. He was just using me to get to Shane.
A soft knock soon came at my door.
"Go away," I muttered.
I didn't want to see anyone. I wasn't in the right mind to talk about it.
My door creaked open, and in walked Shane.
He looked and me and sighed. "You know I can't do that, Jade."
I shook my head at him and looked at the palm of my hands. My eyes refused to look him in the eyes and admit that he was right.
I should've listened to him, he knew him better than I ever did.
There was a dip in the bed from where he sat down. I could feel him wanting to say something but knew he was holding his tongue, hoping I would say something first.
I wanted to tell him that he was right about everything, but I couldn't. For once, I thought that maybe it would be okay to do something for myself. To go after something I wanted, but there was a reason that I didn't.
This was that reason.
The silence was taking over the room. I don't know how long we've been sitting here, it could've been an eternity, but the pain I felt in my heart was still there.
All I wanted it to do was go away.
"You can say 'I told you so' now," I muttered to Shane.
My eyes still didn't meet his, but I could feel him inching his way closer to me. His arms wrapped me in a big hug, letting my forehead press into his shoulder.
The simple gesture made me feel the tears stinging in my eyes.
I haven't cried yet because I feared that if I started, it would never stop.
Shane sighed. "It's okay to cry, you know?"
"I should've listened to you," my voice broke.
He shook his head. "I'm sorry, Jade. I never wanted you to get hurt like this. This is why I didn't want him hanging out with you all the time."
The tears started flowing out of my eyes, as I pulled away from the hug.
"It's just that I got my hopes up."
"Him loving me back. It's alright though, for the last few years I've spent all of my time loving people that don't love me back. It's nothing new."
"I honestly wanted to believe he was different, you know?" I asked, my voice shaking.
I could feel my heart breaking with every word I said out loud. Everything felt like a nightmare and all I wanted to do was wake up.
Sadly, it doesn't work that way. This is the painful reality that I have to face, and I didn't know if I was ready for that.
"I know," Shane muttered.
The next sentence I was about to say, broke my heart. It hurt just thinking about it, but it was the truth.
I swallowed the lump in the back of my throat. "For once, I actually thought I would be good enough for someone. Turns out that I wasn't. It was just false hope."
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The Probability of LoveTeen Fiction
"Maybe instead of focusing on getting girl's numbers, you should focus on getting A's." People automatically think "nerd" when they hear the name Jade Clarke. She excels in all of her classes and is expected to be awarded as Valedictorian at the end...