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I didn't think telling him about Cade would be as hard as it was.

I watched hurt and confusion flit across his blue eyes, I felt something breaking inside of me.

What definitely surprised me was his reaction. I'm not going to lie, I was hoping he would pull me into his arms and tell me he understands my hesitation.

The clock on my nightstand reads 3:30 a.m. The room is dark, but I don't mind. The darkness gives me time to think. Although, truth be told, I wish I could sleep. My body is exhausted, and yet my mind keeps replaying the moment in the field over and over.

His eyes flickered between black and blue as they stare into my soul. Sparks fly across my skin and my breath quickened when I realized that if I made any kind of movement our chests would be touching. A blush floods my cheeks but instead of closing the gap, he shifts and ran away.

I lean my back against my headboard and pull my knees to my chest. I can't believe I just let him go without helping him understand better. What is wrong with me? Maybe I should have gone after him? Maybe he wanted me to and instead I didn't?

Maybe I'm a disaster.

All I have done is make a mess out of everything. At every fork in the road, I make the wrong turn. Someone needs to get me a freaking map.

I take a deep breath and run my hands through my hair when I hear a noise coming from my window that sends my senses into over drive. I stare at the window, not knowing what it was an afraid to know. I jump slightly when I hear it again.

There cannot be anything dangerous out there, the pack warriors are out there doing their jobs. But should I go check it out? What if something got by our warriors?

I stand slowly making my way to the window as the noise sounded again. My dark blue curtain shields me from what ever is causing the noise. Do I really want to know?

My hand grips the curtains and I slowly pull them away. Outside my window is dark, again I am thankful for my werewolf sight. But I see nothing out of place and the noise has stopped. I am going crazy, that's the only explanation.

Still, I can't stop myself from opening the window. The minute the air hits my face, I smell him. His scent fills my nose and sends my heart into a frenzy. My wolf now pacing my mind calling for our mate.

I need to see him, to talk to him and make him understand. All this alone time has given me time to think. No matter how scared I am, I cannot let him, this chance, pass by. I need to be happy, not only for me, but for Cade as well.

I'm just hoping he will understand and let us go slow.

Yes, I am on the second story and yes a jump from this height won't hurt me. But I don't want to seem over eager. If Thomas is still out there, than I am going to use the front door like a civilized person.

Not caring that I am in my pajamas, that mainly consist of running shorts and a spaghetti strap shirt, I slip on my shoes and sneak out of my house.

For a house full of werewolves, that was surprisingly easy.

The early morning air nips at my exposed skin as I close the front door quietly behind me. A low growl sounds from behind me before I can even turn around. Judging by the way it sends a shiver to my spine - it's Thomas. As much as I fight it, a smile spreads on my lips as I turn around to look for him.

"What are you wearing?" his voice comes out as a growl and it catches me off guard as I look myself up and down.

"um...Pajamas?" It was meant to be a statement, but for some reason it came out as a question.

What was wrong with my pajamas? I thought they were cute but mostly they are comfortable to sleep in.

"No one should see you like that - Only me!" He closed the small gap between us and pulled me into his arms, placing his head in the crook of my neck. I tensed immediately.

Even though he was my mate, and my wolf was purring happily in my mind, this was the closest Thomas and I have ever been. The suddenness of the hug, not to mention the sheer roughness, has caught me by surprise and has reminded me of Cade.

Seriously, I need to work on that.

I pulled away from his embrace and out of his arms. His eyes held an apology but he didn't say one. Instead he pulled his hoodie over his head - exposing the bottom of his stomach and clearly defined abs and start of a V line.

My breath hitched in my throat and it wasn't until I heard a small chuckle that I realized I was staring.

"I can take my shirt off if you want to get a picture?" His smirk made my eyes narrow as he handed me his hoodie, silently asking me to cover my self up.

A part of me wanted to deny it, but the other, much larger part wanted to wear his hoodie because it was his. Plus it was cold out here.

Now it was his turn to watch me as I wiggled my body as I pulled his hoodie on. His mouth hung slightly open and his eyes were wide. I could practically see the lust swimming in his eyes as he traced my body with his eyes.

"Do you want a picture?" It was my turn to wear a smirk and I wore it proudly. He snapped out of his daze and met my eyes with a smug smile. I was confused until he reached in his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, I couldn't fight back my laughter. He may have won this round but the game isn't over yet.

We stood in silence for a few minutes before I finally decided to break it.

"Why are you out here so early in the morning? Don't you sleep?"

"Don't you?"

"I would have been if someone hadn't been trying to get my attention" I gave him a pointed look. Maybe I wasn't sleeping or even really trying, but he didn't need to know that.

"Sorry - I, Uh, I just had to talk to you.. about what happened earlier today." he rubbed the back of his head nervously and I couldn't help the flutter my heart did at the sight.

All I could do was nod in understanding. For that is what I really want as well. I don't want to rush into this head first. I want to get to know him, really know him and make him understand.

"I know this -" I start but he cuts me off.

"Will you go with me somewhere?" His eyes stare into mine and for a minute I forget where I am.

But then I remember that we are standing out front of the pack house and will probably have an audience soon. If we don't have one already. If we are going to talk and figure this out, we need to do it alone. So I nod. 

"I found a place while running." He states before grabbing my hand and pulling me to follow him.

<3 <3 <3 <3

 


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