(You're 13, don't worry you'll get older XD and just so you know it may be a while before Gaara will be mentioned because I want to build up the story a bit)
It's been hard for me to sleep lately. I don't know what's causing it to be this way. Maybe it's the constant screaming and yelling every night. Or just the thoughts in my head that make me think of different scenarios that haven't happened, yet I feel as they have because they would make me extremely angry or sad.
Well, whatever it is has slowly been driving me crazy. From hearing voices, to seeing things that come from my worst nightmares. Making me paranoid to were I don't even want to sleep. With Gaara on my mind still I also think of terrible things that could be happening to him that make me want to scream and run all the way back to the sand village without stopping.
Ever since this insomnia, the most I've gotten to sleep was 3 hours, and luckily last night was the lucky night of those 3 hours.
I get out of bed and look in the body mirror I stole from a nearby convenience store. Seeing the heavy bags under my eyes that were sunken into my face and loosely hanging, yet decently fitting clothes on my body made me sigh. Wishing I had things that didn't make me look homeless was hopeless but I couldn't help the forlorn feeling creeping up the pit of my stomach.
Since we moved to the leaf village, life had took a turn for the worst. Dad lost his job because of his constant alcoholic beverage drinking and so we haven't been able to keep our status and reputations up.
Hearing lots of commotion coming from downstairs, I changed into the best clothes I had to see what was happening yet again. Despite not being able to get anything new I was still able to become a ninja. Focusing every part of my mind on training and nothing else has...kind of? Distracted me from the things going on. And to be honest, it was kind of driving me insane as well.
I feared that sometime in the near future I would actually go insane. Mainly because of the anxiety and paranoia that randomly popped up out of no where, heh. Often times I would catch myself talking to me and answering myself as well but of course that was only because of the anxiety...hopefully. I've had multiple panic attacks because of my lack of sleep and because of things rushing into my head all at once.
My siblings already ruined their lives. Being drug users, they haven't given themselves the chance to turn their lives around. Only overdosing once in their lives but continuing on, they are bound to have it happen again. Also fearing for their lives has driven me to the edge of sanity but somehow I've held it together.
Fixing my hair to the best of my abilities, I walked silently downstairs, my footsteps not making a sound. Able to sneak out without getting anyone's attention, I walked towards the area I'm supposed to meet my team. My team consisted of Ino, Shikamaru, and Choji. I was happy with the team, no one got on my nerves except for Ino when she wouldn't stop bickering with Sakura about Sasuke. It saddened me at times. If only they knew what true friendship was like. They would never want to loose one another over a love interest.
People often steered away from me, avoiding conversation with me because I come off slightly creepy to them. I don't really blame them though, for I don't have the most approachable look on my face all the time. No one talked bad about me though and didn't seem to mind my presents regardless of my aura. There were times when people liked to make conversation with me and they weren't scared of me so they would every now and then come up to me and include me in things and be my friend. It made me happy kind of, they were nice people.
When Asuma-Sensei showed up, Ino, Shikamaru, Choji and I all worked on the separate Justus we wanted to learn. I worked on my teleportation jutsu, making me teleport to different areas to confuse my opponent and making me look as though I was glitching.
After training Ino ran up to me. "Hey (Y/N)! Kiba's throwing a party in celebration and good luck for everyone moving on to the Chunin Exams. Would you be interested in coming?" I thought over it for a second and decided it wouldn't be a bad idea to go. One, it would give me something else to distract me from the things happening at home other than training and two, it would make me seem as less of an antisocial introvert. "Sure, when is it?" I asked, tilting my head. "It's actually today in two hours so if you want to run home and shower from the training first then that would be alright." I nodded my head with a small smile. "Okay, thanks for the invite, I'll be there." She smiled back at me and we both went our separate ways.
When I arrived home, everything was quiet for once. I steppped into the bathroom and stripped my clothes off of me, turning on the water of the shower. I set a towel out and checked the temperature of the water before stepping in, scrubbing the dirt and sweat off of my body. Bang! I practically jump out of skin and let out a yelp. "Hurry and get the hell out of there you're being loud as shit!" My dad screams at me. I finish my shower, still trembling from the scare when I get out. I dry off, get dressed and step out of the bathroom, running towards my bedroom shakily. I get scared easily. From the traumas in my past and possibly near future, I've become very timid and it's one thing I wish I wouldn't have developed. Being a ninja requires bravery and that, I do not have.
Still wearing the same thing I wore from training I decide, with an hour and a half to spare, to wash them. I take them off once more, throwing on other clothes for the time being.
After washing the clothes I hang them up to dry and lounge in my bedroom until then. Staring out the window I thought to myself of how nice my teammates were and smiled a bit. Glad to be able to be somewhere where people were nice to you. If only Gaara could know this feeling. I hope he does. Having not been with him in about, maybe over, 3 years, I don't know how he's turned out and if he's doing okay or not.
After an hour of sitting in peaceful silence and looking out to the beautiful sky of Konoha, I got up to check my clothes. Taking them off the clothes pins I fold everything up and put them away. Putting on (Circle outfit above, it will change throughout the story.) Putting on my shoes I left to make my way to Kiba's house with the last 30 minutes I had.
YOU ARE READING
Never Alone Again (Gaara X Reader)Fanfiction
Gaara....He was so lonely and in need of someone to help him through life. You came along in an early time to help him but left soon after. Years went by and you eventually got to see how Gaara turned out after you left. You weren't proud of how he...