A child's innocence. The best part about being a kid.
A child's innocence keeps them oblivious to the unfair world people call a life.
Keeps them oblivious to those who hate there bodies. To those who want to die. To those who are trapped.
A child's innocence. It's a beautiful thing. To bad mine was taken from me and I never got it back.
It started when I was six. My father was a drunk bastard. My mother a gold digging bitch.
My father always called me names. I was used to it because I couldn't understand.
Soon the name calling turned to abuse. It wasn't constant. At first.
It started out with a slap or kick once in a while. Soon it turned to every day beatings. Same thing from my mother.
I was barely shown love. I never got tucked into bed, or kissed good night. Never had a stuffed teddy to call my own. I had to make my own. I made teddy. He was made with sewing needles, red string and had buttons for eyes. It looked like a fucked up toy that was sent threw a paper shredder. I loved it.
I barley ate. The only time I got food was sneaking it or digging leftovers out of the trash. That was before school started.
I was happy to make friends. At first i was shy. Didn't talk to anyone. The teachers didn't care.
I always tried to make friends but all the kids went away from me. I'd try to show them teddy but when they saw him they'd go running. Soon the name calling from them started.
I was always envious when I saw kids with actual toys.
The teachers never noticed the new cuts, sprains or bruises on my small body.they never noticed that I was alone. Never noticed me staring at kids toys. They never noticed how when it was lunch I'd eat like a dog.
They never noticed. No one did. No one ever did.
When summer came around I was forced back into the hell hole. I always thought that they beat me cause they love me. My innocence hid the truth from me.
By the time I started middle school i still believed that. Kids still hated me. I was always picked last for any game.
The abuse at home got worse but I used my mothers makeup to hide any bruises that were visible. Until she found out and beat me so bad that I broke my arm.
I had to get a cast and by what my mother said it costed a lot.
She beat me again when we got home.
I was 11 when it got even worse. It was summer. I was in my room. Doing homework. My father came in drunk out of his mind.
He forced me onto my bed. He forced my pants down.
The rest of my innocence was taken from me that day. Along with my virginity.
The next week my father was rougher than normal. He ended up beating me with a broken bottle.
He cut my face so bad that I had to be taken to the hospital by my mother. I needed stitches.
It was so bad that the doctor said my face would be scared. I felt empty.
When we got home I rushed to my room and searched threw my closet until I found what I was looking for.
A hockey mask.
I put it on and hid in my closet clutching teddy as yelling erupted from downstairs.
There was a lot of yelling. Only yelling and my crying.
Then the yelling stopped. The door opened and slammed. There was the sound of stuff breaking down stairs before my door slammed open and my father ripped me out of the closet. I dropped teddy and he stepped on him.
He ripped my clothes and pined me to the bed. No matter how much I cried, screamed or begged he wouldn't stop.
He never stopped.
I waited for school even though it would bring more ridicule.
Years passed And here I am. Waiting for tomorrow so I could leave the house and walk to high school.
So I can walk to my hell away from hell.
I drop the razor blade into the sink and turned on the water. I watched as my blood slowly went down the drain.
I wrapped my arms up and went back to my room, making sure to make no noise.
I get into my bed and sigh before I close my eyes, grab teddy and fall into a dreamless sleep.
I had moved a year ago and had made friends over the summer with kids who go to my high school.
There's Tyler, Craig, Brian, brock Lui and David.
They all have there own channels. Tyler's is IAmWildCat, Craig's is mini ladd, Brian is Terrorizer, brock is mooSnuckle, Lui is plain Lui calibre, and David is daithe de nogla.
I had started my channel before them and it was called Vanoss.
I paced my room excited for school to start tomorrow.
My mom walks in, puts a box on my bed, looks at me, smiles and shakes her head before walking back into her room.
I walk over to the box and open it. Inside is a stuffed orange and black owl.
They are my favorite animals.
I picked it up and held the small fluffy toy in my Hand. "THANK YOU!" I had asked her to order it off of amazon for me.
"YOUR WELCOME!" She yells back. "NOW GET SOME SLEEP!" I roll my eyes but do as she says.
I pull my shirt off and flop on my bed deciding to leave on my sweats.
I snuggle up close to the toy and sigh happily. I can't wait for tomorrow.
I slowly drifted into a dream filled sleep.
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A Cry For HelpFanfiction
Johnathans stuck in a hell he calls home. abused by his mother until she leaves. Constantly abused by his drunk father. He's abused emotional, physically, and sexually. Will someone hear his cries for help? Or will he die alone. Evan moved a year a...