*~* Rikku's P.O.V. *~*

I was just laying there in that hospital bed wondering what to do. Should I just keep my eyes closed or should I open them? What the hell, I went for the latter of the two. As I opened my eyes, I figured out that it might not have been the best decision ever due to the blinding light coming in through the window. Instinctively, I turned my head and looked to the other side of the bed.

Next to me in one of the hospital chairs they have in the room, was a sleeping Zander; his head rested in his hand which was balanced on the arm of the chair. I was pretty sure that I couldn't reach out far enough to knock his arm off the chair, but there was a cup of water on the rolling table across the bed. Instantly I got a sly look on my face and got the cup then splashed it on him, jolting him awake. "Rikku!" he growled at me, his voice low and sexy from just waking up.

I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled out of my mouth and filled the otherwise empty room. It felt good to laugh again and to see the smile that started to spread over Zander's face. "Good morning sunshine!" I said to him, smiling.

"You know you're going to pay for that right?" he said to me, trying to act all intimidating but failing. He got up and practically towered over me, then slowly brought his hands down wiggling his fingers my way.

My eyes got big with realization. "No Zander!" My attempts to stop him from tickling my sides failed miserably. He started to tickle me and I started to squirm uncontrollably, laughing. "Please stop, Z! I'm begging you," I tried to get out through my fits of laughter.

By the time he stopped torturing me he was so close to me that I could feel his body heat radiating off of him and the smell of his cologne. My eyes flicked between his eyes and his lips, my body wanting what my brain and heart know wasn't right. "Rikku..." I loved the way his deep voice said my name. Just as his lips pressed my own, I pushed him away since I couldn't move back anymore. "We can't do this Zander, I love Damon."

All he could do as a response was to nod his head and walk away, leaving the room. I rested my head against the pillows and closed my eyes. God, I'm so messed up right now. It wasn't until right when I reached for my water cup that I saw my bracelet that Damon gave me that night. Picking it up and turning it over in my hand, I couldn't tear my eyes away from the engraving and rubbing my thumb along it. I heard footsteps down the hall and it wasn't till then that I looked away and at the door to see Shane come in.

I put on a small smile for him and held out my hand for him to take. He pulled the chair next to my bed closer and held my hand, gripping it tightly, but not overly. "So I got a call from my step mom..." his face fell and I knew that it couldn't be good news. I squeezed his hand sympathetically. It was a full minute before he said anything else and when he did I felt my heart breaking for him. "He's gone Rikku..."

"Shane, I'm so sorry," I told him. I couldn't think of anything else to say, there was nothing I could to make him feel better. Shane and his dad have had their issues over the years, especially ever since he picked them up and moved away, but deep down he was still his dad.

I could only imagine what he was feeling was the same that I was when I lost my mom years ago. I squeezed his hand sympathetically and his eyes reached up to mine. I could see the pain he felt inside. Before I even knew what he was doing he lowered his lips down to mine. This felt like a repeat to what just happened with Zander and I, except I didn't push him away. However, I didn't pull him closer either, I just let him do what he needed to feel better in that moment.

After a few seconds, Shane pulled away and I saw a glimpse of someone standing in the doorway before they turned and left. I just about burst into tears for the millionth time since I've been in this hospital as I heard Damon's footsteps storm down the hall.

I couldn't even look at Shane, regardless of his dad's passing. There was no way for me to even go after Damon because of all these fucking machines and needles. The only time I have felt this powerless was when he was shot while on deployment.

"Alison what's wrong?" Shane asks me, completely oblivious.

Pissed that he keeps calling me by that name I lose it. "That's not my name Shane, how many times do I have to say it?! You just made me possibly lose the only person in my life that I gave a shit about. He picked me up when you broke me into a million pieces, he was there for me when you weren't. So do me a favor and just go back where you came from and stop ruining my life!" For lack of a better thing, I threw my pillow at him and he just got up and left. Again. He didn't say anything, just left.

I had never felt so alone as I did right now. I had pushed everyone away, but I had no other choice. Determined to get out of this stupid bed, I yanked out my needles and sat on the edge, feeling the cool linoleum under my feet. I stood up on shaky legs, weak from not being used. The machines around me were going haywire but I didn't care, I needed to get out. I started out slow, my legs almost giving out. My arms were straightened in front of me as I neared the wall to help keep my balance. The further I went, the more tired I felt, the harder it was to breathe, and the more I started thinking this was a bad idea.

I walked along the hallway past the nurse's station, almost to the elevator until someone saw me. "Oh my God, Rikku!" I faintly heard behind me. The sound of footsteps grew faint as I dropped to the floor and my eyes rolled back into my head, my vision black.

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