Living In My Head (Drarry)

Chapter 22: Taking It Easy

Chapter Song: Sweet Sacrifice by Evanescence

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I woke up in the infirmary again, the thought "how many times would this be in the past week" blinked in and out of my head on occasion, the thought forming in pieces. Looking up, I see Remus, Sirius, Severus, and Dumbledore watching me from my bed side. Slowly, I ease up onto an angled pillow and their whispers stop immediately.

"Harry, we need to talk."

"Headmaster-"

"Albus is fine."

"Okay," I drawl slightly, realizing they gave me some kind of ibuprofen for my headache, making me a bit out of it. "Albus. What are we talking about now?"

"Tom Riddle." the name made me shiver in response, not going unnoticed by all four who stared in curiosity.

"You mean the really dead guy, Tom, or The-Voice-In-My-Head, Tom?"

"Both." he says seriously, pulling a pipe from his pocket, "Do you mind?"

I shake my head, "Where to start?"

He lights the pipe, puffs in thought, then looks back at me, "Are you aware of how he died?"

"After Severus pushed him away from me, he ran, he was shot before being caught by the police, he died on the way to the emergency room." I say automatically, detached, as I feel the scratching again.

"Yes, and you know Mr. Longbottom and Ms. Granger's involvement?" he blew a smoke ring absently, looking back at me.

"Hermione's parents were the coroners that preformed the autopsy on my parents' bodies. Neville's parents were cops on the case and were eventually killed by Riddle as well.

"No... Neville's parents were tortured, almost to death, he happened to be at his grandmother's at the time, so he remained unharmed. His parents burned their house down after they got out of the hospital, with Neville and his grandparents inside. Neville managed to save his grandmother and grandfather and the final copies of the case files, his parents were sent to a mental institution for the criminally insane for arson."

I felt the scratching get faster, "He didn't tell me..."

Remus, Sirius, and Severus stood, exusing themselves to the hall. It was at this point I felt the tears running down my face.

"Harry..." his voice was sad as he tousled my hair, a frown forming on the corners of his mouth. "He's a strong young man, he's a fine boy."

"He's got it so much worse than I do, and I have the nerve to have an option and choose who I can live with. It's just plain wrong, Albus!" my voice cracks in anger and I watch him rub his short beard in thought.

" Talk to him, tell him you know, have a real conversation. Now... back to Tom. Why are you hearing him, do you have any ideas?"

"Hermione said it might be a coping mechanism to deal with seeing the murders of my parents. From what she's read about it, it seems like a plausible idea, and it does make sense. After looking at my parents' files, they had no traces of schizophrenia or any other similar mental illnesses."

"Then what's this I've heard about you running out of classes suddenly, vomiting, and spontaneous fainting?"

I feel my hands shake and I grab my knees, willing it to stop, "I've been thinking of a psychology book I read a few years ago and I've concluded it's most likely PTSD. I have the memory blocks, the anxiety attacks, the emotional distress, detachment, insomnia, irritability, distrust."

"Usually," he takes a few puffs "I'd say not to diagnose yourself but everything you said was accurate. I had a patient when I was a doctor, he was called Moody by everyone in the ward. I think you can surpass this, Harry, you're not only a strong-hearted young man but you also seem to be improving all by yourself. It seems to be getting a little better."

"I am ready to head out now, Albus."

He helped me stand, muttering a 'take it easy' and I nod before heading into my second class.

...

I sit beside Hermione who watches me in shock as I sit beside her, Snape gives me a look, a small, worried smile and continues his lecture. I look to my right and Draco is watching me protectively, and I want to tell him I'm alright but the look that Snape keeps giving me makes me finish my assignment. Once class is dismissed, he pulls me into a small and empty hallway, standing less than a foot away from me.

"What happened, I heard Granger say you weren't in first period and you were gone for almost half of second? Is something wrong, Harry?"

In that moment, I really had missed Draco; I smiled a little too wide, my eyes getting watery and I shook my head. "Just had a rough morning, I passed out again."

He put his hand on my forehead, feeling for my temperature, "You're really cold."

"It's the weather, I was outside a bit ago."

"Don't lie to me, Harry." he said harshly, glaring at me as the clock chimed for final call to classes.

"Another time, Draco." I nodded, walking with him and the other stragglers into Lockhart's class.

I sit in my seat beside Hermione and Neville and I notice Draco stand at the seat in front of me, smile at the girl sitting there and she nods, running and sitting in his seat. Leaning back, he stretches and yawns, the final toll sounding and Lockhart starts class. Hermione mouths questions about Draco towards me but I act preoccupied listening to Lockhart's mindless droning on and on.

...

After class ended, walking with Hermione and Neville, Draco walks quickly past us and I try not to notice, but I do. I notice the way his hair flicks when he walks fast, the way he walks with his back straight and no slump in his shoulders. The overhead lamp flickers over him and he stops midstep to look up at it before moving on. I catch Luna's eye from across the hall and I wave, pushing Neville in her direction.

He smiles, running over to her, leaning against the lockers beside her, someone opening their locker and hitting the back of his head. He laughs awkwardly, blushing, as she curiously feels for bumps on the back of his head. Walking to the last class, Hermione changes the one-sided subject.

"So, about the Fùtbol Tournament... are you gonna try out?"

"I'll try," I say halfheartedly, still thinking about how to talk to Neville.

"Who are you going to take to the Tri-Way Ball?"

"The what?" my thoughts stop and I turn to her, confused.

"It's when the tournament starts, after the holiday break." she says with a grin, "We can go together as friends, on one condition."

I humor her, smiling, "And what would that be?"

"We help each other pick out what to wear. Obviously." she adjusts her bag on her shoulder, grinning.

"Deal."