Chapter 5

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It didn't take me long to catch up to Hawk. He refused to respond to any of my attempts to get his attention. I was forced to follow behind him, steaming at how easily he ignored me.

I'd never been able to ignore his presence.

When he took a turn away from the clubhouse, I was surprised, but I followed anyways. We needed to have this out. Maybe we couldn't go where he wanted us to. I wasn't willing to lose the family I'd come into over it. I wasn't willing to lose my riding partner, either. I'd known Hawk since before that was the name he went by and before I was Devil, before I was even a Marine. He was more than the guy I went out on patrols with for the club. So much more. Even if I didn't usually let myself think about that.

Because I didn't want to think about it, examine it, talk about it, I might be losing the one thing I would allow myself to have with him. It would kill me to lose that, too.

The sky darkened above us, and I looked up from under my helmet. Heavy clouds were rolling in. I flashed my headlight at Hawk, hoping to get his attention finally. His head moved, as if taking in my signal and the clouds above when I pointed up. But, he didn't stop.

I really didn't want to be getting wet while on the bike, but the only other option was turning around and abandoning Hawk, which would give him the idea I didn't think he was worth it.

I couldn't let him think that.

I kept following. Even when the first drops of rain hit the backs of my hands. Hawk didn't react at all. He had his leather jacket on under his cut already. I hadn't bothered to grab my coat before running out of the apartment. I had no protection save for the long-sleeve shirt I wore under my own vest. It wouldn't take long for it to soak through if the rain continued.

Hawk turned down yet another road, and I swore a little. This wasn't even toward the place he kept away from the clubhouse. Where was he taking me? No, that wasn't fair. He hadn't asked me to follow him. This was all my own fault. And it was too late to go back now.

The rain came down harder, pounding against the top of my helmet and soaking right through my shirt and jeans. He turned again, this time down what seemed little more than an overgrown trail. Maybe it had been a driveway once, but it didn't look like any vehicles used it in some time. There was a barn at the end of it. Probably a miracle it was still standing, yet Hawk headed right for it.

I did, too, idiot that I was.

He rode straight into the barn, since the door hung open anyway.

I did, too. Sometimes, I thought I would follow him anywhere. Even into Hell. Or an old ramshackle barn.

Hawk was already climbing off his bike when I shut mine down. He took off his helmet, and I caught my breath. No, I couldn't do this, couldn't let my thoughts go there. It would only lead to disaster.

I couldn't stop watching the way water streamed down his face. The helmet kept the top of his head dry, but the rest of his reddish-gold hair plastered the sides of his face. I didn't even know why that snagged my attention so much. I'd seen it before, often due to sweating outside, but for some reason, now I couldn't move off my bike.

I pulled off my helmet and hung it off the end of the handlebar all without looking away from him. His chest heaved as if he was out of breath from running the distance we'd ridden. He slowly closed his eyes. "Fuck, Damon."

I'd only heard his voice that rough once before. The only time I'd let things go too far between us. I couldn't let it happen again. "Hawk, please don't do this."

"What?" He slipped off his vest and hung it from his handlebars only long enough to remove his jacket, then he put on the cut again. He brought the jacket over to me. I took it but didn't put it on as I did finally climb off my bike. "Find a place out of the rain?" He stepped back again.

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